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: Forum Etiquette 101  ( 45613 )
hentaiboy69
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« #15 : March 01, 2012, 05:04:56 AM »

Lover.......you, Tightfit74, Keiko, Janine Dee, Adera & Bear have your good reason, no one deny it.


I see everyone here like a potential friends, no matter if i had talk whit them or not or if we have different opinion on an argument, i think it's a normal thing. will be really sad to see someone of you leaving the forum for trash (yes, trash.....i think this is just trash even if the argument is serious) like this, couse it's impossible for me to meet peoples like Blue or NG  who live in the US and are usually in game when i'm sleeping in my comfy bed.
look at NG.....she is coming in the forum one at week , or maybe two, recently....it's sad, she is nice and i consider her a good friend and i will miss her. like i had miss everyone who are thinking to leave and how i had miss Rukya for the short (thanks God!) time she left.

i hope we can end all this right now and back to a peacefull mood and conversation

    HB
« : March 01, 2012, 05:13:23 AM hentaiboy69 »

Janine Dee
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« #16 : March 01, 2012, 08:31:19 AM »

I was leaving, slowly but surely, I was leaving. Drifting more, and more because everywhere I turned every valid topic was getting flooded by OT, and I had less and less desire to bother with it, and yes with the Forum.

When I was approached with this I found myself with some new found hope that there might be a future for the Forum that went beyond (borrowing from Zinah) "one line flirt fests".

The kinder gentler approach had been tried, if I remember correctly the "Blue's House" thread started because of those gentler methods, but for my part I didn't see the OT flirt fests in other threads slowed in the slightest.

So when a group of friends approached me with this idea I said I wanted to sign my name to it because I agreed with it whole-heartedly.

I think as important of a question in this discussion is... Why has it gotten to this point that we felt this was our best option?

Bathed in moonlight
I'm proclaimed by angels cry
Think well
Do take your time
Because your soul
will be mine the day you die

Kamelot, Descent of the Archangel
hentaiboy69
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« #17 : March 01, 2012, 09:00:22 AM »

This gonna be my last reply here, i don't wanna think and read more of this situation.......


All and no one have them fault for the OT, someone more then others. leave a thread whitout OT is utopy, don't deny it. What had disturbed most of the peoples who reply at your "open letter" (my personal opinion!) is the way it come out, like if it's a sort of inviolable dictat of the older members of the forum, pointing fingers here and there. Probably it wasn't in your intention, but this is how it  seems.

I don't wanna point fingers to anyone saying "It's all your fault!", couse i'm here for enjoy some fun and enjoy some new friendship, not to arguing in a bad mood! i'll take my faults and i'll gonna try to use the forum in a better way from now on.

Last thing and i'll end this: i'll stop to promote the forum till the situation is back to normall, cause this is not the rigt atmosphere to wellcome new users.

From now on, i don't replay more here.

      HB

TightFit74
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« #18 : March 01, 2012, 09:38:24 AM »

I want to thank everybody for their reactions, whatever tone it was in.

     Over the past weeks/months, enough remarks and posts have been made, subtlely requesting to stay more on topic and be respectful towards the interests of others. They have been ignored and seen as unimportant (the nagging of a couple of oldtimers?)

     This has led us to word our discontent the way we have. Some off you are offended, angry, pissed even. A perfect description of how I have felt when reading some posts over the last period.

     Some have picked up on the suggestion to the a-team to have the forum cleaned up. I have made efforts to coherse the a-team to take their measures to make the forum more accessible, as it is a part of their business profile. I still very much urge them to do so..

     This topic, provocative as it is in tone, is for me a follow up to the suggestions I have made to the a-team a  few weeks earlier to increase the value of the forum for its members, the company and anyone interested in starting to play the game.

 I hope a discussion will arise from this, as it was our intention


The mind... the most powerful Aphrodisiac...
Keiko
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« #19 : March 01, 2012, 11:06:29 AM »

    I think we've heard from most everyone who has an opinion about this matter. I've tried to understand the points raised by those who find this thread offensive and I'm reading alot of, "I feel personally attacked, I will erase my posts, I will leave, you think you're better than me, etc." Well if everyone would stop being selfish in presuming it's all about themselves and start using the mentality that this is about the forum as a whole.

     Take the time to re-read the posts in this thread and explain to me who is making the attacks? Who is shedding this subject in a negative light? You say it's the council? For poorly choosing our words? I encourage you to stop scrutinizing the words and listen to the ideas.

     Now try listening to yourselves. You love the forum? Then what are you defending? The freedom to post what you want where you want? How will that benifit anyone else but yourself? Just for a moment I urge you to swing that judgemental pendulum the other way, looking at yourself in the mirror and tell me with confidence that the forum is fine because I am happy.

     You made your voices clear, and they said the council can go straight to hell. Now you have another choice. Lets put our egos and emotions aside so we can discuss solutions like adults and together.  Or let your ego control your emotions, get upset, point fingers at me for being insensitive then ignore or leave us. I am staying here to work out a solution with anyone who cares about the forum, what will you choose?

Zinah
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« #20 : March 01, 2012, 11:19:10 AM »

The "I'm going to take my toys and go home", attitude of several of the respondents, rather than looking at the points objectively and finding ways to discuss the issue, is disappointing.  The entire point of the OP is to do for ourselves, what, if AChat had a larger mod team, would be done for us. NO other forum I attend permits the level of OT bloat in their threads that has occurred here.  I had already left and decided I wasn't going to renew my premium status.  I only scene with one person, and as we don't have server-wide/general chat, the forums were what bought me back day after day and the forums have changed into something that for me, was unappealing.
« : March 01, 2012, 11:35:29 AM Zinah »
hentaiboy69
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« #21 : March 01, 2012, 11:40:33 AM »

ok, i had read the post of Tight, Rukya and Keiko (Zinah had posted meanwhile i was writing. i'm sorry u wanna left.....hope you wanna accept my apologize for all this) and i HAVE to break my promise..........


First, Rukya, please, try to calm down a little and take a deep breath (this is for all, me too!)

Tight and Keiko.......increase the forum!? sure it will be great, but we can't do this alone. we need the help of the dev-team, we need their presence in some circustance, when we can't help other users or can't give an answer to a specific question (example, demonxxx request on the poll). Whitout their help, the forum can work good, but never increase his value......not how i mean it.
« : March 01, 2012, 11:42:29 AM hentaiboy69 »

Lover
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« #22 : March 01, 2012, 11:51:49 AM »

@ Zina: Totally agree, you hit the point.

HB, thanks for your constructive post. Sometimes we need the A-Team, I agree. And there a lot of things we can do alone, just take a look at promoting the forum.
When Janine and I (and soon after Adera, Bear Tight and some other) started "to awake" this forum, there just have been few threads with in about 8,9 members posting. Was it a good time? Yes. But at least, our wish was to increase this forum. We wanted to have more voices, more ideas, to be the forum and important place for every member.
Look what has happened: It was and it is growing. That's great! Just to keep it growing in a healthy way, we need all members. If we don't be careful (each one uf us) there is the big danger of lots of confusion until the day the A-Team will intervene - then it has been a great forum for the longest time. None of us, I'm sure, want this. So each of us has to look to himself first.
There is no room for thinking "I wanna have just fun here and if anybody says something against it, he is an asshole". For this there is a better place, called AChat itself.

PS: You thought about stopping promoting - that's your good decision of course. Just read my wish: If any new user is reading this, recognizing there are almost all members working for the same idea, to have a helpful forum with nice people and everyone is allowed to give his honest opinion, will he really be scared? If your answer is same as mine, please go on promoting.
« : March 01, 2012, 11:56:02 AM Lover »

Pafe
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« #23 : March 01, 2012, 12:40:59 PM »

Hiya's...

   I really don't know what to say here except put out my own experience.  I have only belonged to one other site that used a Forum like this, and it was really helpful to a new person or newbie (or is it noob?) like myelf, to be able to go to a place and actually get an answer to how to do things either on the site or posting in the forum.  Like it was stated in a previous posting I was not allowed to start a thread or topic until I had made 20 posts.  Even then there was a specific post that dealt with "etiquette" that I had to read before I was allowed to post.

   When I first looked at this forum, everything seemed so jumbled and disconnected, and I could not find answers to my questions (I almost gave up).  I had to actually ask people in the AChat game how to do things here in the Forum.  Something as simple as putting a picture up as an avatar here.  (Thank you Medjai for helping me with that).  Then I began reading some of the old threads and learning from those, too.  I even commented on one that was way out of date, and no longer valid (was corrected on it, too).  Then I began posting in some of the newer discussions, even flirting, but gave up posting the flirts in them because it didn't have anything relative to add to the discussion.  I thought about how I felt when first reading the topics, and how I had to page though posts to find anything that pertained to the subject, and I did not want to add to that.  I love you all dearly, and reading the banter that goes on can be fun, because I think I know you all, but at first it was very frustrating to find things I was looking for.

   I hope everyone just takes a deep breath and counts to 10.  Please don't feel that anything that was posted was directed at you personally, I don't think that is anyone's intentions.

   As for the Forum and what I would like to see.  I would like to see some sort of a chat box, so if you want to flirt and banter, that would be a great place for it.  I would like to see a complete section devoted to the new person. (How AChat works, how to meet people, the advantages of being premium or free, how to do everything in the forum, etc.)  I would like to see a section devoted to the Poses, the existing ones and the ones we would like to see developed.  I would like to see a section devoted to the clothing.  Some of the ideas and designs you clever people have made are extrordinary.  A section on rooms.  Then the sections for the stories and contests and even the jibberish.  I could go on and on.

Thanks for letting me share,
Pafe

P.S.  What the heck is "OT"?

P.P.S.  I wish I had seen this before I posed here.  Look at the post here from Adera
http://www.funnyadultgamesplay.com/forum/index.php/topic,1454.0/topicseen.html
THAT is what I am talking about.
« : March 01, 2012, 12:47:02 PM Pafe »

hentaiboy69
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« #24 : March 01, 2012, 12:50:52 PM »

lover, isn't the forum itself, is the community who use it. it had grown, i see it from when i subscrive 6 months ago, and i think all of us wish it begin bigger, whit new and (hope so!) fresh suggestion for the dev-team.
I think we have to wait two or three days, so we can all calm a little and restart to work togheter, as we usually do and, when and where it's possible, joke, tease and maybe more. afterall, we are on achat for this too! meet new peoples, make new experience and enjoy our fantasies!


Medjai, Blue, NG, Rukya and all the others who answer here.......this "open letter" hurts, i know, but not only cause we think it's pointed on us, but cause we know there is a true behinnd it, even if at the moment we don't wanna recognized it cause we are angry, in part disappointed. take our time, think on it......and if i'm not right at 100%, i am at 80%, i'm pretty sure of it. hope i can talk whit all of you directly in game, or if you disagree whit me, u can send private message.

Pafe, beatyfull world, really!, and i agree whit your idea on the forum structure! yes yes, mature woman are the best!  ;D

P.S.  OT means Off Topic

Zinah
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« #25 : March 01, 2012, 01:47:23 PM »

"You can whinge all you like about OTHER FORUMS DON'T ALLOW WHAT GOES ON HERE but you miss the point that this is a sexual fantasy site where people come to enjoy themselves, this is not a forum run on it's own as a site set up purely as a forum."

To be clear, I left the forums because things had gotten, in my mind, out of hand  The forums ceased to be enjoyable for me.  I came to this thread because I heard the topic had been opened up and was being addressed.   

Responses like the above however, make it clear change will not happen.

Be well.

Zinah

Keiko
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« #26 : March 01, 2012, 01:49:01 PM »

I use the term "Council" loosely because some might assume we think of ourselves more superior than others and that is not true.

     Rukya, I already addressed and cleared up the confusion about the choice of using this word within the first few posts. Call us whatever you want, "group, organization, rebellion, misfits, etc." This is not and should not be an issue.

 
 
No what made me so very very sad and angry was the fact that rather than open a thread to collect opinion to swing behind  an ostensibly sensible proposal, a few people had got together in private off-forum and discussed what They thought ought to be the way the forum was run.
 


      I don't know which one of us is stopping you from making this a discussion, but I can assure you ( as I already have any previous post) that we value your ideas and want your input.


 

Having discussed it off-site they then came back with a topic which they had had lots of time to prepare and discussed amongst themselves, but again rather than open a discussion this topic was posted as WE THE UNDERSIGNED think this is how the forum should be and will all you clutter-uppers of OUR Forum either do as we say or go away and leave our forum to be run as we want it.

     This is a very distorted and perverted way of looking at the topic. We discussed it extensively amongst ourselves because we knew it was an important and controversial subject. We also finding more important enough that it deserves some deep consideration. I think we could have easily locked this topic if we didn't want anyone else's opinions.

 

but you miss the point that this is a sexual fantasy site where people come to enjoy themselves, this is not a forum run on it's own as a site set up purely as a forum.

     I disagree, this is in fact a forum by name, design, and intention and it should operate as such. Try and find another forum that operates the way you described, there is none.

 

On the forums you are talking about everyone talks gossips to each other outside the forum, which is just what you did to come up with this topic,

 There is nothing wrong with discussing a thought privately before posting it publicly.
« : March 01, 2012, 02:01:20 PM Keiko »

hentaiboy69
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« #27 : March 01, 2012, 03:14:40 PM »


Having discussed it off-site they then came back with a topic which they had had lots of time to prepare and discussed amongst themselves, but again rather than open a discussion this topic was posted as WE THE UNDERSIGNED think this is how the forum should be and will all you clutter-uppers of OUR Forum either do as we say or go away and leave our forum to be run as we want it.

     This is a very distorted and perverted way of looking at the topic. We discussed it extensively amongst ourselves because we knew it was an important and controversial subject. We also finding more important enough that it deserves some deep consideration. I think we could have easily locked this topic if we didn't want anyone else's opinions.

 

On the forums you are talking about everyone talks gossips to each other outside the forum, which is just what you did to come up with this topic,

 There is nothing wrong with discussing a thought privately before posting it publicly.

Keiko have a point on this. for all them this is an important thing and talking togheter about it out of the foruum isn't bad. maybe, yes, there can be a different way to put out this discussion (and maybe in a better mood), but at last i think they had reach their goal: make all us think on what we want for enjoy in a better way achat.

I wanna ask to all to take a little break on this thread to clarify your thouugh, i think it's the better thing to do!
« : March 01, 2012, 03:23:18 PM hentaiboy69 »

Bear
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« #28 : March 01, 2012, 03:21:16 PM »

Meant to jump into this long before but due to technical issues couldn't...

Call it what you want... we saw something happening and felt strong enough to understand that if things did not change the value of certain sections of the site was going to be destroyed if changes did not happen. My friends here knew they were going to take serious backlash for their words.... perhaps to overlap into the site itself.
Be chastised for calling things out  It's a risk they took. I admire their courage...  and when they tracked me down,  asked would I back them... told my friends I would support their issue.

Because it was this behavior that made me indifferent... left me in spot of "what's the point of adding here". Whatever I said would be buried behind a parade of flirts and pointless banter… the idea lost to their indifference. In the end I left,… though I still pop in from time to time… nothing has changed….other than the group in their flirt mode has grown. My friends spoke up because this behavior had pushed them to that point where I was... rather than go silent they wanted to make their stand together.  Watch out… cause there is a great deal of creative intellect there  you may force away.

The why to act as a group was very easy…because individually we HAVE tried.. and been  ignored.. so if it takes this to get your attention so be it. IGNORE my ass if you want... the truth still stands.

The topic of this Section is "Share your creative ideas... that may be added to AChat"

That last line was never there originally... it rose because suggestions made,.. ideas nurtured were and they did listen incorporate many into what you now play. I smiled when I first saw that pop up because I knew then we had their attention. A poignant statement of affirmation to what was going on that renewed my resolve to influence this place somehow. For that reason I tried hard for a long time to change my behavior and keep things focused and on topic. Yeah we bantered and played... but when ideas rose.. out attention refocused and we hammered at them,... pissed and moaned... but kept pushing.

HB I have told you before it's along process sometimes... you have to have faith they will answer your requests...create as specific request as possible that falls within the current boundary of the games construction. Be tolerant of those who propose too much that don't... and try to to shift discussions to things that might become reality. Because the developers  always have been silent...but they do read the threads. The little things they do here though treat like gold... like those sticky threads created,... they were done for a purpose. Recognize that fact, they don't want pointless banter bloating them...to sort thru...they look specially for workable suggestions, ideas that spawn interest... I speak to you directly because eventually you may find yourself in that spot... the old mentoring group long gone...

 Pafe points out the problem… new members can’t find the ideas… Adera comments… a poster feels frustrated and ignored… new ideas die… because folks treat them with indifference.  That’s the key to understand… play in those spots where you have created play… leave the spots for creativity alone… If you can’t add something to the topic, best not post.

Don’t tell me they don’t listen,… they may not react in the forums but we have seen things into fruition.... maybe 75% of the things added the past year arising from ideas brought up in the forum and thoughtfully discussed. (Including the slider bar) I like to think that cabin was from my suggestion made a long time ago... so much of the details seem from my original thoughts including the duster on the wall... and the fact the pattern on the covers on the couch are bears ... it to me was like a gentle nudge of thanks from them (whether true or not.. I'll play in that delusion)

We saw our collective voices galvanize to get a better release pattern for the LGBT players. IT WORKS… as does the creative ideas. Stand in unity…treat these threads in this section with some seriousness.

What pisses me off in reading the responses here is the lack of understanding of the intent. It is your community… but play in play areas… create threads in the right areas, treat creative sections for their purpose… It is your forum,… make it what you want… but understand  how harmful self centered posts can destroy golden opportunities.

Done and out of my rave… I wish you well, whether you hate me now or not.

hentaiboy69
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« #29 : March 01, 2012, 03:57:47 PM »

HB I have told you before it's along process sometimes... you have to have faith they will answer your requests...create as specific request as possible that falls within the current boundary of the games construction. Be tolerant of those who propose too much that don't... and try to to shift discussions to things that might become reality. Because the developers  always have been silent...but they do read the threads. The little things they do here though treat like gold... like those sticky threads created,... they were done for a purpose. Recognize that fact, they don't want pointless banter bloating them...to sort thru...they look specially for workable suggestions, ideas that spawn interest... I speak to you directly because eventually you may find yourself in that spot... the old mentoring group long gone...

Bear, i can have faith and i will. only bad point is on the recent thread about new dress and poses........i thimnk we have to work on a little brief on them. in the one about dress, there are a ton of suggestion, maybe too much!

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