...a part of me really want to do it, remembering my old experience (20 years ago!) cause at last, when i think on it, it was really exciting. it wasn't full sex, just jerking of in front of each other or stroking his cock sometimes (he had done the same to me) and it was only few times, but cant' get this tough out of my mind now....
I had think about this all this weekend and at last, i decided to write this cause i need to have some opinion about something about my experience here....As all you know, i'm a man but there are so many others things you don't know but maybe someone of you had notice.....well, first of this things is i don't have a so open personality in real. i mean, in my work i have so many contact whit different peoples and administration, so during this last 12 years things had move a little better, but when it comes about personal stuf and interaction whit girls, well, i'm a totally dumb ass and, please don't laugh cause for how i am it's totally embarassing, i have to admit i don't had have any type of relationship and you can easly imagine what it means: never had sexual experience before.....And here comes the experience i have here and the only real one (even if it can be considered a full sex experience): from when i had started here at the end of august, i had meet so many nice peoples, girls and boys, and at last i had really enjoy both and some of them know about my true self, some peoples i really care or, anyway, peoples i find interessing.Well, all begun 7 months ago....i had post before about i had met a man who, when he learnd i live in Italy, had say to me he would like to meet me cause he move to italy for work, sometimes. I explain to him all, about i'm a man too and i'm not into that type of stuff.....Some time had passed from that and, before Christmas, he say it again and i answer him i don't had change my mind. After that, he disappear for long time from Achat, till he pop up again some week ago and we had met again, many times. Till few days ago, when he said to me he hope someday he can do it in real......i talk whit him explaining it again, about i don't want it or, to be more clear, i'm not sure if i want it. And last friday night, things get "worst" (it's not the right word....): talking whit him when we was in room, it cames out about my mail (in this moment, i don't remember how we end talikng of it) and he ask to me if i can give it to him. Ok, it wasn't a big deal, cause i had set one just for Achat (not my real name on it, of course!) so i had give it to him.....well, after few minutes, he had send me a pic of his huge cock......that had surprise me and confused me......i mean, wow, never expect it so much (but it jump in my mind he will probably do it) but i feel my hearth bumping damn fast! we continue our meeting and it was so exciting....so much! and, before leaving, he had ask me if i will send him my pic.......oh my! anyway, i answer him i need time to think on it and i don't had make any promise.But for this two last days, i can't stop thinking on it......on his pic......a part of me really want to do it, remembering my old experience (20 years ago!) cause at last, when i think on it, it was really exciting. it wasn't full sex, just jerking of in front of each other or stroking his cock sometimes (he had done the same to me) and it was only few times, but cant' get this tough out of my mind now....Plus, well, i can't deny i had try something more by my self in the past years, even if it was just some isolate time......yes, i had try my fingers in my ass and some, well, sort of home made toys......i can't say i'd really love it, but even i can't say i don't had like it......And now....something i had never expect before is happend....thanks to Achat, or maybe it's only the fault of Achat!? i don't know.....Well, the point is this: i had start thinking how it will be touching his cock., playing whit it......i feel this desire growing little by little and pushing me to the desire of sending him a pic and maybe more.....till, maybe, meeting him.....and this is confusing me too much, never had think about this stuff before!I had talk of this whit another friend here (he know i'm a guy too) and he suggest me to take my time: i know he is perfectly right and i agree whit him, but really....in this moment it's so hard to clarify my mind.....and this is why i'm writing it here, cause i really want to know your impression and, i'll hope!, maybe i can have some other good hint from you, my friend!A really, really confused HB