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: BI or STRAIGHT..... MAKE UP YOUR MIND !  ( 50295 )
Superman777
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« : January 21, 2011, 10:53:34 PM »

I recently had an encounter with a female (at least i think she is) on the game.  When we initially met, she was all about being straight.  She even went so far as to tell me she was not gay, not at all.  I believed her, not that it matters to me what sexual orientation she chooses to be... because it doesn't.  We continued talking and playing around for about a week or two, and though our conversations it came out that she had feelings for women and had relationships in the past and had feelings for one in  the present.

 All of the sudden her orientation from her profile changed from "straight" to "bi" .  she claimed it was because she was just curious about the game, but when she asked me to help her find a "real woman" and then  to join her in a mff, things suddenly became very clear. it was like she became a completely different person with a woman. she acted like it would be a one time expeience, but from observing how much she enjoyed it versus with me, i could tell she was hiding something.     However after this experience she went back to being "straight" .  she claimed she would never do another mff again because of this "horrible" experience.  she said this even though during the entire mff she could not stop telling the other girl how much she wanted to get a room alone with her.  talk about full of it.   however she is now currently "bi" once again.  so much for the "horrible" experience. all of this happened within the span of less than a week.  if you need to change it that often, you have issues.  who knows how many times she will change it in the next week.  i doubt she will after reading this.  stop messing with people's heads and make up your mind.

Is it just me, or is it kinda ridiculous and annoying that some people cant make up their mind or are just too ashamed or afraid that the keep it "undercover".  I think you should be only be allowed to choose your orientation once, when you sign up.   after that you should have to stay with that you have.   let me know what you all think about this. 

And to the "undercover " girl , and you know who you are.   Please stop.   Its annoying.  Thanks.
Janine Dee
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« #1 : January 21, 2011, 11:28:07 PM »

A. Some people do it in order to filter out annoyances of certain genders. Like women who selected "homo" in order to filter out overly persistent men.

B. It HAS no actual impact on rooming. I'm gay and could room with a man (though I'd probably be distracted by the head injury I suffered  :P), and straight women are quite welcome to room with me (and I mean that ladies I truly do  :-* ;) ;D :P).

C.  Sexual Orientation is far more then three choices in real life. The best scale I know of is 1-10 (1=completely het, 10 completely gay) so there are women who may be a 7-8 on that scale who PREFER sex with women, but occasionally enjoy sex with men. So what would she have to choose?

D. It's not that easy for those who are still finding where they fall on the scale. Especially when they find themselves with desires that they may have been raised to see as wrong. It could very well be that the woman in question doesn't WANT to enjoy it, but still does, and is in conflict.

E. Try to remember that this is a game, and while it's a real person on the other end it's not a person you are going to see or know. (Yeah there could be an exception, but it's a very outside chance sort of thing.)

F. Straight or Bi she's willing to have sex with you. So is this such a huge problem? I mean if you are okay with her having sex with other men then you shouldn't have much of a problem with her having sex with other women. If you aren't okay with her having sex with other men then it's more than a matter of orientation.

G. If it's upsetting you this much you may want to follow Caramel's advice and simply step back from them. My advice would be calling them out on it is almost certainly NOT going to have any positive impact.

Bathed in moonlight
I'm proclaimed by angels cry
Think well
Do take your time
Because your soul
will be mine the day you die

Kamelot, Descent of the Archangel
Janine Dee
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« #2 : January 21, 2011, 11:39:28 PM »

Absolutely, but the question has been raised before, and the consensus that was reached then was that no one wanted the level of identity verification that assuring everyone was their respective genders would entail.

If anything it would damage the game as people want a certain degree of anonymity when it comes to cybersex.

The other key point being that real women can be annoying/crude/aggressive/etc too, and in the end it's going to be about the individual, good or bad.

Bathed in moonlight
I'm proclaimed by angels cry
Think well
Do take your time
Because your soul
will be mine the day you die

Kamelot, Descent of the Archangel
Bear
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« #3 : January 22, 2011, 03:23:44 AM »

Well,..does a guy rooming with a shemale go from hetero to bi? Know a huge number of men who do not think that through. Honestly think the designation is merely preference not a black and white issue.

,...and i like the sliding scale concept,...

Caramel',..lol,..try not to think too much of the sinister forces,...one reason why I try to weed out prospective partners by chat.

islandsun
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« #4 : January 22, 2011, 08:29:20 AM »

I like having fun , but I`m straight as can be , Canada is pretty relaxed with the gay community . The girls that hit on me , I`ll joke and talk w them .  I even introduce them to each other ! ok theres a method on my madness > get them hooked up w someone like them ! SO they  stop tryng to convert me ! LADY`S WONT HAPPEN !   I like a real   HE man !  Give me that vertical stick !!!!!!!!! LOL
Adera
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« #5 : January 22, 2011, 09:21:02 AM »

I think its a matter of how the guy wants to have sex with the shemale, if he's mostly interested in sucking her dick and get fucked by her he should consider actually being bi. I for one actually prefer my guys to be hetero and to treat me like a woman but I don't go around hitting on them since its not very nice... at least not too much. :P

I would also say that some women that wants to room with a shemale here (I guess its mostly out of curiosity) are in fact quite hetero. They just want me to perform like a guy which is quite confusing to me. They could of course do it another way with real women... I don't know.

Anyway I don't think people should just get one choice in the matter here as AChat provides a great place for exploring ones sexuality.

@Janine, lol... head injury. :D
Janine Dee
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« #6 : January 22, 2011, 09:54:21 AM »

Actually Bear if I'm remembering right it's official title is the "Kinsey Scale" because it was created by the Kinsey Institute in the 70's when they went and started researching those naughty things no one ever talked about.

Yeah, as a geek girl coming to grips with her sexuality I did research.  :P

As far as shemales... even they have had a wide range of where and how they view their spots on the scale, and Adera sweetie you have been wonderful for insights into those mental mechanics. In this case however it was a (presumably) straight guy and a girl who seems to be having trouble knowing where she fits.

So while I kept it focused there the mechanic IS fairly constant across that whole scale. A person has to find for them self where they fall on it, and under the right circumstances (yeah like the aforementioned head injury  ;)) that position may change.

Bathed in moonlight
I'm proclaimed by angels cry
Think well
Do take your time
Because your soul
will be mine the day you die

Kamelot, Descent of the Archangel
Lover
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« #7 : January 22, 2011, 12:49:41 PM »

Superman, did you ask her about this? Possible the easiest and first thing to do - perhaps she really is searching her orientation (here or for real life).

Maybe she is just friendly and doesn't wanna hurt your feelings when she is telling you she is straight?

This forum is open for everything and we like to talk and discuss about everything. But we never should forget first to talk with the effected people.

Unhealer
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« #8 : January 23, 2011, 04:35:02 AM »

C.  Sexual Orientation is far more then three choices in real life. The best scale I know of is 1-10 (1=completely het, 10 completely gay) so there are women who may be a 7-8 on that scale who PREFER sex with women, but occasionally enjoy sex with men. So what would she have to choose?
Actually there exists more than 2 genders, and im not just talking shemales. there are 2 biological genders for the most part, and then psychologically there are probably 6, I think that makes 36 possible orientations. where someone can like 1-6 different genders, which i think are cisgender male, cisgender female, transgender male, transgender female, and then the people who kind of fit under both (bigender? I dunno)
the biology tends to get in the way for several reasons, but LOTS of guys are into transgender females more than cisgender females
Unhealer
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« #9 : January 23, 2011, 04:40:20 AM »

not sure if it would be 5 or 6, because theres only one possible gender where a person is both male and female in their mind, but I suppose it would effect males and females differently.
Janine Dee
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« #10 : January 23, 2011, 08:10:12 AM »

A valid enough point Unhealer, though I must admit I haven't heard the figures you are speaking of. For me I boiled it do to Heterosexual=Attracted to the opposite gender. Homosexual=Attracted to the same gender. Bisexual=Attracted to both genders. The one to ten fell along those three.

BUT as my post asking for shemale views on orientation showed there is a much wider range.

Again though, I wanted to keep it to this case rather then take it too far afield.

Bathed in moonlight
I'm proclaimed by angels cry
Think well
Do take your time
Because your soul
will be mine the day you die

Kamelot, Descent of the Archangel
TightFit74
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« #11 : January 23, 2011, 11:47:45 AM »

I don't think gender has anything to do with sexual orientation.. It's just a way to specify more..


The mind... the most powerful Aphrodisiac...
Unhealer
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« #12 : January 23, 2011, 12:28:01 PM »

problem is that those 3 oversimplify the hell out of it, bisexuals end up getting discriminated against because people think of them as omnisexuals and pansexuals end up getting called asexual or something. Me being "hetero" gets me called gay a lot because i dont like manwomen (giant part of the female population) which are hard to explain but essentially it feels like they have an invisible penis that they like to smack guys with. (I attract them; I think im a bigender or something) I think cisgender females are okay but if im right they go after cisgender males usually
Bear
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« #13 : January 23, 2011, 01:44:09 PM »

Knsey's report shook society when it first came out,..and pretty much models the simplified male/female views down to simple biological categories.

Unhealer your thoughts here are provoking of consideration. Been awhile since I have read of the cis-gender issue,..was never formally defined though that may have changed over the years. Certainly it should be considered, in the scheme of discussion...however I think it reflects more to style of play then orientation.

Unhealer
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« #14 : January 23, 2011, 02:27:08 PM »

im sure if the operations and stuff advance more it will be a lot more literal aha
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