AChat Forum

Discussions about AChat => Share your creative ideas => Topic started by: TanyaTanya on September 27, 2010, 12:02:37 PM

Title: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: TanyaTanya on September 27, 2010, 12:02:37 PM
It seems that some people are getting worse with the stuff they say instead of being nice. Just today I have been told to 'fuck off beach' for rejecting a cold invite, had numerous demands and I paste this one exactly coz there's no way of explaining how bad it's getting.
Down on your knees slut crawling to my feet and look up at me to start rubbing and licking my balls bitch i want you to rub your toungue around my shaft and suck me deep whore i wanna feel the warmth and the wetness of your mouth slut
This was my first msg from the guy. Can we list the really bad usernames to warn our fellow players here or is that not allowed?
It'd be good if we could warn each other on mass to block these people before they say anything crude or upsetting that we don't wanna hear.
Tanya. xx
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Janine Dee on September 27, 2010, 12:12:04 PM
"beach"?? If someone would call me a bitch I would at least hope they could get the spelling somewhere resembling right.

As far as names... it HAS been done... once that I can remember. I haven't, and I've wanted to a time or to, so I honestly don't know what to advise.

The one time it was it was telling about a serious mind fuck... well I don't want to go reopening any old wounds, but it was serious.

So I guess the main question would be if it's worth it? I've dealt with assholes, and some I've wanted to name for the world to see, but in the end I didn't see them as worth any extra stress on my part.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: TanyaTanya on September 27, 2010, 12:16:55 PM
I get your point. If it's really serious I have no doubt the staff will help us, but for general repeat offending assholes I'd consider it worth my time if it stopped one person's mood being ruined after a long day. x
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Adera on September 27, 2010, 12:20:09 PM
Shit, thats like... really rude... I would never enter a room with such an abusive ass. Not even to punish fuck his ass.

"beach" I think its was the slang word "biatch" the guy was trying to write Janine.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: TightFit74 on September 27, 2010, 12:31:52 PM
as a guy it is sometimes hard to imagine what women have to put up with when online. I have a few friends that have told me what the general first line is and it shocks me sometimes. Maybe I've been raised old-fashioned, but I have learned to talk to poeple in a polite, normal way. And I have learned it brings a lot more than being rude and putting women down.
I pitty the men that think this is a game where you pick up a whore and have your way with her. Just as much as men  there are women online that want to have fun, but with respect. Except for the occasional exception, I am sure that no man would accept being talked to as if they are for sale.
If you found eachother in a rp, or some other connection, if there is  a reason for it, by all means, say what you want. But rudeness is polluting the world and we should start seeing it.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: TanyaTanya on September 27, 2010, 12:43:25 PM
This is why you have friends and get to have fun on here, and they don't. xx
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Janine Dee on September 27, 2010, 02:43:49 PM
Tight, I think that is a large part of the problems in the world, but I've ranted on this in many threads. People are left to see freedom as freedom from consequence. They can do what they want to whomever they want, and anyone that tries to hold them accountable is oppressing them. It's online, it's offline, it's every damn where.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Garryz on September 27, 2010, 05:42:04 PM
Hate to say it but i have had similar bad mouth requests even though i am male, from male and females (males pretending), I just put it down to kids coz i have played online games and thats there natural talking rude abusive. Seen a few females saying they leaving on there messages through idiots.
I call them the fly byers. coz they dont last long in the game, only people who can be nice to each other last in any online community.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: TightFit74 on September 28, 2010, 08:30:39 AM
I think that always a form of politeness is found amongst the people that survive a community. As it is with all laws, you have the 'freedom' to neglect them. As long as you can handle the consequences when caught. You can drive faster than the speed limit, it is an option. But don't be surprised to get a fine and accept it without complaining. In all types of groups, societies or communities. rules of how to deal with eachother emerge. Wether it is insitgated by nature or by agreeing on rules together, somehow it always happen.
If you look at what happened in the general chat ( a much discussed subject), there were a lot of complaints about abuse, using bad language and simply rude people. After a few days you could see a change start to happen as spammers and rude people got a piece of their own. Dissed by people who are serious about the game and want to have a good time. The community started forming rules on how to behave amongst eachother. Too bad it didn't get a chance to develop these rules further.
Still, it isn't easy to have a set of rules of how to communicate with eachother as long as there are no consequences to bare when neglecting these rules. It's even more difficult to hold someone responsible if there are no rules at all. For that matter, AChat leaves it up to the community to form their own rules. So appareantly it depends on how you handle rude people, fakes and spammers. I can't find a guideline from AChat on which I can base a request to ban someone for instyance. What is acceptable and what isn't? As long as noone (with the power to) sets the rules, there is not much you can do against fakes, spammers and rude people
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Bear on September 28, 2010, 09:40:33 AM
There is no easy answer that question.

AChat is a place of sexual fantasy, and the personality types range from passive to aggressive. The misconception is that passivity equates to acceptance of abusive language. It doesn't.

 Rudeness is but a characteristic of the personality, and all one can say is use the ignore button. Is rudeness sufficient to validate banning from the site. IMO, no. Only extreme circumstances should be considered, Outright racial, sexual orientation and religious degradation are socially unacceptable. They should be here too,..scammers attempting to fleece others,...those come to mind. The ignore button is a personal restraining order, although the general chat will in its current structure will expose you to them, simple rule, don't respond.

Lover said it best, and I'll paraphrase it to my best ability. Treat others with respect, and dignity, and you will get further with potential partners than any other approach. Good words to live by, though sadly those buffoons are less likely to read the forum and take them to heart.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Janine Dee on September 28, 2010, 10:08:57 AM
For my part I get nervous when it comes to restricting freedoms. Free speech is only free speech if everyone can use and sometimes abuse it. To moderate simply because of offensive behavior is a can of worms I don't think should be opened. Only if the person is truly menacing should it move beyond the societal policing level.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Antebellum on September 28, 2010, 10:20:08 AM
Had to laugh when I was approached by the same guy...he used the same lines, and while I find them offensive, others don't.  We need to remember that it is a bit of a fantasy land...and while his approach isn't appealing to some, it gets a positive response from others...or let's face it...he wouldn't use it.   The great thing is, there is someone out there with similar interests for each of us...and if you get approached by someone that you aren't compatible with...there is nothing holding you to reply or act.

I do think though, that he'd get more of a positve response by actually looking at the profiles....because I really have a hard time believing some 'romantic' would respond how he'd like.  Even looking at an avatar's name will give you an idea of the type of person behind the avatar....and trust me...'his' name totally fit his profile.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Janine Dee on September 28, 2010, 10:30:09 AM
I was JUST on, literally just on and I had a guy say hi, ask how I was, and ask if I wanted to exchange pics. Now for those who haven't figured it out by now. I'm gay, as in sexually attracted to my own gender, as in down with licking the girl bits.  ;D It's in my profile, both homo and that while I'll chat with anyone I room with women.

I've said it countless times before, but it always strikes me as a perfect example of people not reading profiles.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Bear on September 28, 2010, 11:12:26 AM
Posting anything on the profile doesn't provide a complete buffer, but will deter those who do respect, others ploy on, perhaps believing everyone is fair game.

No doubt Antebellum, those who read your banners may think it an open invitation to all. ;)
 That's part of the fun though...
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Lover on September 28, 2010, 11:20:16 AM
Janine, he just wanted to exchange pics; he didn't want to go into room ;)  Ok, bad joke, sorry.

To your first question TanyaTanya, yes, we had published some names here. But I am with Janine - the best is to forget and don't think about these stupids people. Everytime you think of them, you feel bad - not necessary.
And usually we should not give them a stage - you know, some just feel great and think they are a superstar cause their name is known. Like "publicity in every case".

What are they thinking? Probably not much (and I agree with Bear, they don't read the forum) and when I read "beach" perhaps they are not ablre to read. They like the "power" they feel when they shock the person on the other side. They are strong, cause they are anonymous. In real life they get weak knees if they have to order a bread. So think about some "nice" answers for those morons. Then use ignore-button, forget them and have fun with the many friendly people around.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: TanyaTanya on September 29, 2010, 06:18:06 AM
Thank you all. xxx
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: jemell on October 01, 2010, 01:36:21 AM
i agree guys will come up and just say things like heyyy bitch invite me mabey some day they will figure it out i came here to have fun not be called a bitch by an 4 >:(0 year old man !!!!!!
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: sinnnn on October 03, 2010, 11:50:20 PM
Yea, I have my own personal stalker.  Somehow she keeps getting of my damn ignore list. :P

I always get a, Hi Bitch or Hello slut...several invites.  Nothing nice.  I have had several guys tell me off because I won't do them.  It happens, I tell them off, then breath and forget. ;D
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: TightFit74 on October 04, 2010, 08:55:25 AM
Bobbler started a topic called "messin' around", for tips and tricks on how to play the rude, the crude and the downright nasty... More input is always welcome :)
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: sinnnn on October 04, 2010, 01:52:22 PM
I'm just more the cuss you out type an ignore after I get the last word.   ::)
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: TightFit74 on October 04, 2010, 02:55:57 PM
And your gentle natures suits you very well :)
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: sinnnn on October 04, 2010, 03:40:08 PM
thank you, thank you.  I do so try. ;D ::)
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: bobbler on October 06, 2010, 07:39:00 PM
and despite the hard-ass side she projects here, she does have a soft side (oops, maybe i shouldn't have said that  ::) oh well)

more on topic (and you know i like to be the devil's advocate):
this is a sex site.  achat is a sex program.  some guys are going to come on to you girls and be rude and crude...get used to it.  just put them on ignore and move on.  don't let it ruin your day...and don't take it personally and be so sensitive about it (yes cutie i think you are a little bit...but i admire your spunk and wanting to tell guys off sometimes...i know other girls who like to do that also)

and yes...if the line didn't work, he wouldn't use it.  there are women who would respond positively to him

@ janine: there are guys out there who consider your homosexuality a challenge, trying to turn you and get you into a room.  they could care less about what is written in your profile or under your avatar
and it *still* amazes me how many people, guys and girls, write "no colds" or something to that effect.  it doesn't work...never has, never will.  and i'm sure people see that and cold invite just to piss the person off
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: sinnnn on October 06, 2010, 08:37:21 PM

@Bobby- You know there are times I want to kick you in the kneecaps and then kiss you after.  :P :-*

Well if someone feel as tho they have the right to be rude for a come-on, then they should expect the verbal glass of water to the face.   
No Cold invites work, babe, just not 80% of the time.  At least it cuts down some of the cold invites, there are ppl out there that can read.


Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Janine Dee on October 07, 2010, 03:53:39 AM
As far as putting anything in the profile that you expect a person to read... I know I can usually be sure they won't, but at that point I feel they have then entitled me to treat them however I choose. Sort of like a sign that says "Trespassers will be shot." If you then trespass, you can't bitch about getting shot.

That said at this point responses are more rewards from me. I tend to simply use a little i ignore where they can't even be sure I'm on. I even let those damn cold invites click to zero unless they pop in when I'm character editing and the like. I just don't want to give them the time or energy.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Adera on October 07, 2010, 05:34:00 AM
Janine I usually treat them the same way as you do :).
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: TightFit74 on October 07, 2010, 10:02:09 AM
Even though playing them for a while can be pretty gratifying ( I agree with Janine that coming on rude deserves the same treatment back), I can understand that for girls the situation is different. You got so many more cold invites then we (or maybe I should just say me), so I can understand just ignoring them by letting the timer run out to zero or putting them o ignore list. Usually, when I let the timer run to zero, I et no send requests. They get the point
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Lover on October 07, 2010, 10:09:18 AM
Sure, girls get much more cold invites than we men. And I agree with you: If they aren't willing to read the profile they don't deserve a friendly "come in".
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: JennyT on October 08, 2010, 03:00:27 PM
This reminds me of a very rude telemarketer one of the girls had to deal with at work ...

If they aren't willing to read the profile they don't deserve a friendly "come in".
Make the "straight" (aka closet bi) guys leave me aloneeeeeeee

-edit-
And in my AChat window as I was typing that here ...

"Hi Jenny"
"Wanna fuck?"
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Lover on October 09, 2010, 03:14:18 AM
And... did you want to?  ;)
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: JennyT on October 09, 2010, 05:39:34 AM
Not with that particular person!
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: beachbeauty on October 14, 2010, 03:15:09 AM
... and thats why the ignore button is my best friend  ;D
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Unhealer on October 15, 2010, 01:09:08 AM
Jenny, arent you the one who thinks im a chick on a male character or something?
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: TightFit74 on October 15, 2010, 06:22:12 AM
Shouldn't this be a personal message instead of post?
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: JennyT on October 17, 2010, 04:04:06 PM
nah, Unhealer and I just love stirring each other.

I'm determined to get him into a room and do unmentionable things to him but he's all "nooooo i'm straight I only like chicks wah wah wah"  :P
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Adera on October 17, 2010, 04:36:35 PM
@JennyT: Tease him alot :P.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Unhealer on October 17, 2010, 10:19:54 PM
haha no she doesnt like straight guys so she wants me to like males
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Adera on October 18, 2010, 12:49:56 PM
Aww, thats too bad. Straight guys are much more fun imo.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: bobbler on October 18, 2010, 02:10:17 PM
i'm sure they are  ;D
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: TightFit74 on October 18, 2010, 03:56:35 PM
as long as noone tries to "save us from just being straight"  ;D
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: Adera on October 18, 2010, 04:08:30 PM
Why "save" a straight guy? In my case I just want to be treated like a girl :P.
Title: Re: The rude, the crude and the downright nasty.
Post by: TightFit74 on October 18, 2010, 05:02:53 PM
Some girls want to turn a gay guy, some guys want to run a gay woman. Why wouldn't it work the other way? ;)
and as far as being treated as a girl... I was raised a gentleman, I'd treat you like a woman :)