AChat Forum
Discussions about AChat => Share your creative ideas => Topic started by: apollo13nut on December 16, 2010, 04:41:53 PM
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This is starting to really piss me off. Why the fuck are there assholes here that feel the need to own EVERYONE (for a specific example, look at fighter's list of friends, lovers, spouses).
I have had people put me on ignore for being the "owner"
One had the nerve to tell me that this game was build for a master/slave and any illusion to the contrary means i'm in the wrong place. The website has this listed as a dating service.
I am getting really pissed with people like fighter, triton32, and others that feel it necessary to own others.
Yes, I realize that this is how some people choose to "play the game" but when the fuck did it become their right to tell me to play it their way or leave?
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Keep cool apollo. I've said it before and I will keep on going to say that: If they put you on ignore-list it's their problem. Then they are not worth it to spend time with them.
Is Fighter the problem? I can't understand people here saying "Fighter (or any other person) owns me". They are having a problem. I don't care for Fighter and he doesn't care for me. Ready.
If there are people, trying to explain you this game smile and forgive them. You are upset now. Is this your wish?
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I've seen a few of those people, like fighter, checked how many spouses and lovers he had... more spouses than I have lovers. Makes me wonder though, they should be good in a room when they have all those girls be their "slaves"... but somehow I doubt that. :D
Chatted some with a woman who claimed to be some kind of pimp mistress. She told me she didn't want to play but right after saying that she told me she wanted an exclusive shemale lover. The words she used meant that I would only get to play with her as long as I was with her. I just laughed and told her no thanks, then she got all bitchy and angry saying stuff like "your loss"... pfft yeah right. The whole conversation was kinda surprising and amusing.
To me it seems like they have some kind of internal game of who can conquer and keep most people to themselves... well I'm not joining that.
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It is most definately a male competition thing. Someone said (sorry for not taking the time to look it up... Lover is very good at that ;) ) that whoever spends most in the shop, gets first on the list. (@Bear maybe that's the order?).
Second to that, I talked to a girl that she put that in her banner because she received gifts for it (no dimes and nickles) and by word of mouth, i heard more stories that they being paid.
I haven't bothered to look on any of these users how many friends etc. they have,, if they really have this many, they'd have to be on here 24/7 to keep everyone satisfied. Seems pretty impossible to me.
In my view they aren't even worth the time that I spent on this topic..
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i don't like seeing guys who say they own girls either...or girls who say that they are owned by some guy. that is so demeaning...makes my skin crawl to think people can see themselves that way...as property. come to think of it, i had a pretty good argument with a girl one night about it...she said that she liked to be owned. and needless to say, after she had her say, she put me on ignore...like i really care ::)
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Okay, I am known enough for my actual D/s experience.
So one thing I learned is that a great many who like to call themselves Dominant do so to mask their own insecurities. There are plenty of names for them, but one of the more polite ones is embarrassments.
The fact that they respond so poorly is a clear sign to me. It could be one thing if they would simply say that they are playing the game how they and their partners enjoy, but the fact they are aggressively trying to coerce others says plenty.
It makes me want to break out some of the other terms, but I've learned to give those wastes as little of my time or attention as possible. If anything the fact they raise their own flags with this "owning" makes them that much easier to avoid.
I do however want to expand on an idea. For some being "owned" to them means that they are treasured, valued, while it looks like the concept is being hideously abused here the core concept of the submissive being a treasure of the Dominant.
Well if you look back in Sinnnn and my theater post when we decided to become spouses... she didn't give me a ring. That's it being done right.
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Wow you guys must really Hate me then. lol
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you got that right...but i wouldn't call it hate...just despise
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I dunno Ramrod, from what I know of you, you get it right.
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I just wanted to vent. For an example, it's like religion....There are many out there and they all claim to be the only true one....I don't really care but I hate people telling me how and who to worship. So people saying the only way to play the game is to own or be owned piss me off.
As for the ignore stuff, I don't really care. If they feel that's the only way to play, then as said, they are not worth knowing. And as much as I would LOVE to suggest banning the practice, I know it won't happen....
Anyway, I figured this would be a good place to vent and see other people's thoughts on the issue.
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you got that right...but i wouldn't call it hate...just despise
Awww I'm sorry Bobo look, I don't want you to despise me. I'm really a nice guy ask any one of my slaves. I'm a peach!
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right...and you're a juvenile, resorting to calling me names
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right...and you're a juvenile, resorting to calling me names
I thought it was a nickname. Very well I'm sorry bobbler. However in my defense your the one who said you despise me.
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so...i didn't resort to name calling...said i despise you. and who here ever calls me bobo?
and...aren't you busy in a room right now?
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I dont condone the practice...... I just pretty much ignore it....
its as old as human nature itself...... remember........ every name .... every profile....... has a person behind the keyboard.... and human nature being what it is...... there will be that sort of thing....
when I come on and look through the profiles....... for someone that seems interesting to talk to ...... if I see "owned by so and so"....... or anything like that...... I just keep on going....... because I refuse to "ask permission" from some 3rd party....... but if thats how they want to play..... thats up to them..... but I dont have to........ nor will I ......
its like being in a big room......... and eveyone at different tables playing .... lets say....... monopoly....... we have all played it and played by different rules....... and as long as you and your group stay at your table and play the way you want to...... thats fine......... just dont come over to my table and tell me how to play....... nor will I go to your table and tell you how to play......
dont misunderstand me........ I really am against the owner thing........ I think its demeaning to those that are "owned".......... and has to do with insecurities, ego and a power trip.....
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so...i didn't resort to name calling...said i despise you. and who here ever calls me bobo?
and...aren't you busy in a room right now?
Yes but you can add multitask to my list of accolades
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Yeah, think I'm going to step out of this thread before I start getting angrier. I started a thread a while back in Erotic Fantasies called Janine's Dungeon. Those who want to discuss D/s rather then simply talk about how despicable it is are welcome otherwise feel free to stay here and talk about how vile we are.
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i don't like the concept of *owning*...no matter how you play it out with your dom & sub routines. no one person *owns* another...i don't care how you spin it...or how much the sub loves being treasured. i own my house, my car...other *things*...not a human being
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Thats fine dude I undestand, it's not for everybody. It's not your right to judge though.
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@ Janine:
I am surprised. Isn't being a Domme or owning someone a big difference? You are writing Yes, it means I can't be the Domme of your (literal) dreams, I need you to tell me your fantasies and desires as much as I would need you to tell me about that carpal tunnel or claustrophobia. THEN I can go to work, THEN I can "Prove my Dominance"
Isn't that the question? A Domme gets the permission. There is a balance of being the leader in this sexual game. But an owner is the one who decides what to do, what the best is and what you are allowed to do, to say...
In this part I am absolutely with Bobbler. You can own a subject, not another person.
But as I mentioned before as long as they don't try to catch me I don't care for them. They have their fun here, I have mine.
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Lover, when the person Adrea mentioned talked about someone wanting to "own" her they didn't break out ropes or nets. To "own" a person you have to have their permission to do so. So even the ones being obnoxious about it have to get the person's consent.
Here it could be as simple as putting someone on their "ignore" list, but they choose not to. Just like they choose to not play without permission.
There is a consent to it.
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First let me say, as long as two (or more) people agree about the rules they make do whatever they want to. As long as they don't tell me I have to do the same and as long as they don't break special rules (children, attacking other...)
The term "own" is something I don't like. Even if a person is asking me to own her I wouldn't do that. It's a question of respect and humanity. And the last and most imortant point, there are much too many people outside who you can influence too easy, even if they don't want this. You just need some ability of communication and unscrupulousness. It's a dummy argument to say they can use the ignore-button or leave AChat.
A woman that is beaten by her friend or husband can leave the house and go away. Most doesn't.
But this is a special discussion. I understand your point of view and repeat my attitude; as long as both agree and as long as it is a special kind of playing AChat iit is ok. This is the reason my first comment was "keep cool". I really don't care about them, they don't care about me. So we can live side by side and have fun. Everyone in his own way.
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I own you all
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I feel some of this discussion got derailed.
I originally posted this because some person had the nerve to tell me that the game is own or be owned and that is the only way to play. I am with Lover for the most part. If you agree to own/be owned, fine. But DO NOT tell me that is how i must play because I will leave in a heartbeat if that is the "ONLY" way to play.
I joined to make friends, meet people, have fun, not be dictated to by some narrow minded bitch that think she runs the damn show. I have people like fighter that feel the need to own all the girls on ignore. The problem I'm running into: there's not many people left to play with. If there are 100 people at a party (if I'm part of the 100, then there are 99 for me to mingle with). If one of those 99 decides to "own" 96, that means there are only 3 for me to mingle with. That is the part I have the BIG issue with.
Think of poker. If I were to remove the kings, queens, and jacks before dealing, that would be called "cheating"....but doing something similar here is considered "the only way to play" by far more than I realized.
Janine Dee, this is not a thread about stopping the own/be owned thing. This thread is more of a complaint about people like fighter that feel the need to try to own everyone else and have the nerve to tell me either play his way or leave. I'd rather see him banned, but since technically he did not violate the TOS, I can't do anything to him.
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yes we go off topic a lot...but at least this time it was a related tangent ;)
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Omg I can`t believe this shit ! I am so pisst off ! I`m shaking just typing , THESE guys are monsters really ! they usually prey on a certain type of female or the very young ! Also in real , at first theyre prince charming , then their true color shows . These women have no worthy have them selfs ! I GOTTA GO
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I was more addressing the tangent, but I stand by that they are flagging themselves as not worth the time. To use your party analogy 96 out of the 100 are wearing a name badge saying "Hi, I'm an asshole." I am in a strange way grateful they saved me the process of getting to know they are assholes.
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Well, I concede to you Janine Dee. You are very right, it is like saying "Hi, I'm an asshole" True, the 4 or whatever left is a smaller pool, but there is a better chance of a better connection with someone in that pool (if not all). Gives me a new way to look at it. Though I will admit, it does sometimes hurt to remove someone from friend/lover because the decide to post something like that on their profile (and when I say remove, I mean they post something about someone else, which to me is not a friend worth keeping).
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Ok ppl, dont be so strict with that..
I did a talking with triton, he explained to me that he NEVER had a demand to his partners to writhe those things about ownership and something like that...
Just consider, there are many girls outhere that getting horny even with the thinking of getting owned by someone...
This is a kind of game also...
For me, when i am seeing such things as those, i dont even waisting my time to talk with those girls...
Cheers... :)
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Oh dear I am late in putting my pennies worth in here, forgive me but I wasn't about in December.... Anyway the suspicions are correct when it's suggested that a certain somebody pays girls to own them, oh yes he pays a lot A dollars to a lot of girls, however I think we need to be careful when we start naming individuals has it is quiet clear that one has issues, after speaking with him many times it was immediatly apparent to me that he may have special needs or is possibly under age, believe me he does not have the cunningness nor intelligence to actually be dominant ,in fact I believe it is the girls that take his A dollars that are taking advantage of him!
Everybody has the right to play the game in their own individual way, be it through S&M/role play/romance etc, ofcourse this doesn't mean they have to the right to threaten others or tell others they must "stay away from my girls" etc etc. But we all need to be a little tolerant to a certain degree. For some the owning eliment is just part of their role play experence and at the end of the day if it wasn't for the A dollar system and the greedy A dollar grabbers it's created, well then nobody would be able to actually be bought.
I have to say I do participate in the S&M relations and without getting to personal, I just adore Ramrod * blushing* so honey you know I gotcha back :) and i can say he does not buy girls (unlike some), Ramrod has other attributes that draw females attention *blushing again* .
Harley I know your really not into the whole S&M thing but I will agree that you have to right idear in basically saying if it don't float your boat then drift in another direction. Harley I know without a doubt you are 100 % percent a gentleman at all times,and I'd like to think that you know me well enough to confiirm that even though I do like a bit of S&M action, I'm no push over and nobody has me in chains telling me who I can and can't play with. I just think live and let live so if someone has 5 or 500 lovers or wants to owned we should just let them get on with it
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Carmel' I have to throw my 2 cents in also,...I agree with your assessment in the first paragraph,...How he attracts his harem is of no concern to me,..(though too I am concerned he is being taken advantage of)...if of the age he has a right to play as he wants.
That being said I am going to set it out, I perceive this party at the moment becoming a victim of what I perceive as cyber bullying. It needs to stop. Completely unnecessary.
I say this with a concern that the party being spoke of may not have the social skills, ... capacity to deal with the this antagonistic attitude being thrust on him.
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Hence I never named the "party" , I think what we also need to bare in mind is there are many that have been named and insulted many a times on forums and don't even know its happening has they don't enter the forum. Maybe this is something for achat to address? Maybe when reffering to a absent individual their name should not be allowed?
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I still remember when through a chain of people I was told one woman on my lovers list was a man.
The problem was that one of those who were proclaiming it had already earned his name on my ignore list as a guy who couldn't take gay for an answer. Since the "woman" in question was already WAY too aggressive I wasn't too terribly attached (and yeah that could be called a sign) and I just decided to avoid the whole mess.
The guy in question, who was on my ignore list, then got posted here by a woman I actually am still quite fond of (even though we haven't talked in months) because he had pulled a SERIOUSLY twisted mind fuck on her with another party.
I can feel comfortable about my decisions to this day, but it honestly felt like I was using a skill set I developed in high school.
The greater truth though is that ANY time you get groups of people together similar dynamics develop, and while you hope people will be able to act like adults it always seems to be a matter of how disappointed you send up rather then whether or not.
I've found all I can do is try to hold myself to a high standard. So I fight to avoid names unless referring to say a specific point or post here on the forum.
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I guess it could be expected that some would act like assholes here like any other place on the internet. The problem with that is that feelings easily gets involved here and can then hurt people real bad.
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I know what you mean , one of them tried that shit with me ! believe me that didn`t go over too well with me ! made my blood boil , those kind of control freaks guys lack something in their real life`s to be pulling that shit ! what i can`t believe is the girls that are degrading them selfs with that crap ! This subject really gets me riled up , in Real I help women with abusive situations . why should life be any different in cyber , there`s the good ! the bad ! and the very very ugly ! Respect has to be showned and earned . I for one will never be owned AGAIN !!!!! FREEDOM ROCKS ! SIGNING OFF > Strong Mined + Free Spirit < = Sunny
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@Island... girl go girl go (and a tip of the hat)
Adventurous souls with imagination can be so much more entertaining..
Echo the sentiment that names are best not used,...fact is the majority do not read the forum,..let alone post.
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"stay away from my girls"...well, we all know who that is. the guy has hundreds & like he's really going to be able to tell when someone is with one of his *girls* ::)
& maybe ramrod doesn't buy girls, but he does buy outfits for his dommed girls to wear. isn't that the same thing?
...3 more sweetie...
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::) I personally wouldn't know if Ramrod buys outfits for "his doomed girls" I don't know how anybodyelse but him and the girl/girls would know? It's hard to comment on something when it's not proven. Another point would be, if Ramrod indeed does buy females clothing then he would be one of many men that do ... so the question would be why focus on Ramrod?
Basically to rephrase the question- would be asking if any guy gifts a girl isnt this a form of owning? My answer would be no to that
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"dommed" girls, not "doomed" ::)
it is proven...i know he does
he buys the girls outfits specifically for domming purposes/related to a domming session in the room...not because they *mean* something to him in any way, like a friend or lover would buy a girl something as a sign of friendship or love or whatever
you focused your comment on him, so i commented on that
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I am unsure if being on Ramrods lovers list means I fall into the catogory of one of his "dommed girls" but it seems you claim to know more then me about his alleged spending habits /reasons behind it and rooming games :P
And please forgive me for the previous typo ::)... I think it was because Ramrods name was mentioned and I got all excited *blushing again* ........ For my blood pressure and the benefit of others I think It's time to move on from him and back to the topic in general
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If they take it too seriously,"doomed" might be appropriate. ::)
bobbler I think the issue has gotten off track,..the precedence of a Dom' outfitting his subs would not IMO be unwarranted.
What I perceive your true issue is that you simply abhor the practice. Done something to provoke a response from a Dom',... :-\
I have many friends who serve a master/mistress, whether I like it or not, we have to acknowledge some personalities around here aren't necessarily falling within social norms. There is a wide divergent practice,...in some cases deviant,...I can't allow myself to judge.
One aspect I keep in mind is in dealing with these is to clarify the boundaries before pushing too far. For some, that Dom/sub relationship is simply personal play,...these banner flags,...a means to stroke the Dom's ego,...other take it with a more serious mindset. I am careful in the latter, to clarify boundaries of acceptable behavior on my part. Adhere to those standards it represents a covenant between us. My integrity is rooted to that because,...well that is immaterial, I am simply bound to respect that covenant.
Janine describes that relationship with far greater eloquence then I could.
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Bear... I'm not sure what you are trying to say about a Dom outfitting their subs, but it could be a simple fact that if he wanted them to wear something they did not have then he took it upon himself to provide it. If that is the case then I would call that warranted. It's like if you wanted a lover to wear a specific costume/outfit anywhere else that they didn't have, you could at least provide it for them rather then expect them to get it.
But the honest truth is that unless Ramrod or one of the women he engaged in the practice with are the ones speaking then it's hearsay.
Carmel... the relationship between you and Ramrod is for you and Ramrod to define, and no one else. If there is confusion it would be good to clarify it, but that's good in any relationship D/s or otherwise.
On a broader level (and Bear used this term, but I'm not calling on him specifically by using it) "social norms" or the very word "normal" is more just everyone agreeing to hide anything that may fall outside that agreed upon mask.
Heck, cybersex falls at least on the edge if not past the edge of "normal" for most people, and every last one of us is guilty of that.
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Janine you are right to call me on this,...I'll amend this in the morning at the moment I am too tired to properly respond.
and I had a typo I corrected. a DOM outfitting his Sub should not be an issue. No more than gifting a friend to purchase a particular dress.
Any reference I make as to social norms is strictly directed at this community. My own experiences here have pretty much stripped a fact that there are a lot of deeper layers of fantasy behind the masks of people here, often these are not revealed to each and every partner.
If you don't like the practices then don't approach those playing it,...and if you do, respect first that there may be limitations there, whether or not you agree with it. It is their play,...
Thank you Janine,...you cut to the heart of the matter like I knew you would.
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:-[ :) I had a feeling it was something like that Bear, but I also figured it I didn't ask you wouldn't know I was confused.
And yeah, as long as it involves consenting adults there are far more important things in the world to worry about.
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Janine I totally agree with what you have said, the thing is like I said in my original post on this topic... We all need to be a little tolerant to other players and what floats their boat. I mean wouldn't this place be boring if the members were all here for the same thing? We may has well all just spend $99 dollars on the misonary position.... lay back.....and play some Barry White ... Maybe then we would be considered has big old romantics or normal...
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*flips through my 8-tracks*
umm...... I found some Barry White.......... *grinz*
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Dommed is slang for dominated, am I right?
First of all, here is a wide level of favours and games - and this is good. As long as 2 or 3 people agrre in playing this game. I personally don't have a problem with this. Also there is no problem with making gifts and to wish, this gift is spend for a special thing - a dress, a style... it just should not be a "must", cause this is the opposite of a gift. Same with some positions. But to demand you may not wear this for others, you may not do tisi with others or you are not allowed to room with others is another quality. Though I don't know if this is the case. I just say this in general.
I have a problem with the term "owning". I've mentioned it before, I don't have to repeat. I don't wanna own, I don't wanna be owned and I want to talk and to meet people with an own character- otherwise I could room with Robot all the time.
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Agree with lover. I like S&M play from time to time, and I prefer to submit. But once the game is over, I want it to be really over until we decide to pick it up again. I don't like the idea of not being able to wear something simply because a master bought it for me, or insisted I wear it for him. That's how I feel about it anyway.
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People in a relationship have the right to establish bounds on said relationship. A heterosexual man dating a bisexual woman may be fine with her sleeping with other women, but would be absolutely devastated if she slept with another man.
Or a swinging couple may let their partner sleep with whomever they wish as long as they are there, or even just told in advance, but would again be devastated if a condition was broken.
By that same line of thought someone who buys a gift for a lover who doesn't want it used it with anyone but them... I mean in a real relationship if a man bought his woman some lingerie he might only want her to wear it when they are together.
Is that so unreasonable?
On the D/s scale it can be a significant part of training. Some may play certain music in the background, or burn a certain incense, OR wear certain outfits.
It creates a trigger that says "Play Time".
People may remember in a recent clothing thread I mentioned my hip high, black leather lace ups, and even just talking about them had me mentally going Domme (I don't know where it is, but it could even be seen in my tone.) I said right in the thread that those boots took me AWAY from a submissive mindset.
By the same token putting a play collar on a submissive can have their minds going there in a snap.
And it's not just in D/s, for many women putting on sexy lingerie versus day to day cotton undies can have a definite impact on their arousal.
Really D/s is often just about openly addressing those dark little dynamics that every has and everyone uses, but no one talks about.
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Janine I love the way you explain these things, 8) You say it with such clarity,...
Like your boots I have my black silken lounge pants,...wish they would give us that, frustrating to stand there in black slacks, but the image is close enough. That alone is enough to trigger the change in my personality,
Carmel I totally agree that tolerance of the divergent play must be made,...that said,..this concept of blanket "ownership" ...the Dom could have just as easily directed all his girls to put bobbler on ignore....the issue would have been solved. Those true to this spirit would have followed order,..the others,...well guess what,..obviously disputing that claim themselves.
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oh NO not the collar > I can`t breath choke choke no master please I`ll behave !!!! hahahahhaa sorry had to do it ! Freedoms just another word Me and bobby Mc kee ;D
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ok sorry : ) NOT !!! Devil made me do it ! hahahaa
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Bear you keep calling me Carmel, its Caramel but its cool, you see I am a women of peace so I don't take it personal bb rwl
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my apologies Caramelcups...and ty...
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I LIKE TITTIES
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Janine, you said
...By that same line of thought someone who buys a gift for a lover who doesn't want it used it with anyone but them... I mean in a real relationship if a man bought his woman some lingerie he might only want her to wear it when they are together.
That's the point. In a real relationship it's different to AChat. Of course, if I buy sexy lingerie for my girl she should not just wear it for other boys - as she should not have sex with other boys. If I buy her a nice dress, of course she is allowed to wear it if we go out (or even if she goes out alone or with her girl friends). If you don't want your partner to have virtual sex with other ones, AChat is the wrong place. Or you both have the agreement to meet here for sex, cause you can't meet in real or something similar.
In my opinion if the person who received the gift says "I never gonna wear this for another person" it's ok. This also may be the wish of the big spender, but never a condition.
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Of course, if I buy sexy lingerie for my girl she should not just wear it for other boys - as she should not have sex with other boys.
That's if YOU buy sexy lingerie for YOUR girl. There are plenty of relationships where they are allowed multiple partners... like those examples I quoted in the rest of the post, I meant those as real world examples.
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I felt that training was becoming it's own topic so I did a... really very long post... on it in my dungeon in the Erotic Fantasies thread.
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K, been little off my game but just read this.
I will admit to being "owned" but not here. I have never wanted nor cared to be "owned" by anyone. But their are differences in "owning". Before the guy I meet, I kept running into ppl who want to "own" me. Control my every action, tell me who I can talk to, can't talk to, like I was to be their lil doll(fuck that shit).
One I found myself feeling cherished, special that something in me submitted. (Pissed me off too). He is a Dom and the "owning" part is more of a game than anything, he did not force me. He asked and I choice to. He sets me NO limits whatsoever, I can do whatever I want, go wherever I want. Its like I am a flower and can't help but turn to the sun. Its a relationship, on trust and respect. When we are in a room, I am his, out of the room and we are like best buds. The rare times that I do sign on and he is there, he does not order me round at all. He offers, after I greet him, to tp me where he is at and we talk with the friends he have round him. (Now I am waiting for one special lady to "own" the hell out of me one day :P :P :-* :-* :-* but I always end up loosing control where she is concerned ;) ;D)
Now the "owing" here are for little boys who want to play in the big boys games but can't. This "owing" makes them look like they are the shit when they are shit. Some guys think the more girls you have, makes you more of a man. "Owing" gives you power. They abuse, then cherish.
@Lover
Ignore them sweety. They don't own this game, so they can't dictate how it is to be played. Next time ask them if they are the creators and if not then go uck off cause your going to play it your way(and however you and your partner decides to play it).
(lil devils advocate here)
In a way relationships are a way of owning someone, if you think about it. Marriage is samething. That person is yours, and yours alone. Yes you share with friends(if your not that obsessive). But if that person should slepp with another, you would flip out. Is that not a form of owning, that that persons gentiles s yours and yours alone. Or how bout their love, you want to be the only one in their heart. You don't want them to love another and leave you, right? "Owning" its all in how you look at it. ;D ;D ;D ;) :-\ :-\ :-\
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;D :P :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :P ;D
And when you get all passionate and out of control I don't want to stop you. :-* :-* :-*
The key to it, or any other kind of relationship is the communication. Whatever levels you set between you as long as they are set by the two of you.
There ARE submissives who WANT to have the Dominant set all the levels, they call themselves (By CHOICE.) slaves. They are fairly rare, more often it's just a submissive who thinks the term sounds hot and leaps before they look, BUT there are those who make that choice. Sometimes just with a woeful lack of information.
What should be restated however is that unless were talking human trafficking there is still that element of choice, no matter how well or poorly contemplated.
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Some are just collectors I believe !!! Really cause I talked to a guy that has 280 friends and about 50 or more lovers ! I asked how the hell do you keep them all satdisfied he just said their not always on ! ...............or he does the best he can . then ask if I collected ! hahahahaha whoa DUDE you don`t know me ! lol :D
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Yes, but they are idiots. Whether collecting on here or seeking to scene with as many submissives as possible in real world.
I would never, could never defend those fools.
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Owning really isn't for me at all. I mean I have had a few spouse offers and I don't want a spouse either. I don't think this game really builds the kinds of relationships that you need to call someone a spouse. I know it's all in fun and this is virtual, but I think it gives some poeple the wrong idea.
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I`m not defending just trying to understand ther need to do this ! Had same crude DOM approached me again ! , told him get in line buddy ! Hey Mr. DOM I`m flipping my middle finger at you ! ASSHOLE !
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Tough one to answer sunny,...some peeps may think long lists to represent popularity how good a lover they are, it can be an ego thing. I know someone who accepts any friend request..whether she knows them or not. As to the Dom...time for ignore button.
I hate the lover requests from those I have never shared time with though.
Figured the spousal declaration to represent the extraordinary partner,..In time Christy perhaps you'll stumble over someone you might click with. Yes a game,...but it's a way of acknowledging that special friendship...
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Christina... have you seen Sinnnn and myself on here? We're spouses. ;) We don't have any big ideas, but we simply adore when we are able to spend time together, or even just respond to each other posts or send messages.
In her case simply listing her as a Lover or a Friend wouldn't feel sufficient.
Now she is my only Spouse, but there are those who also have a TON of those.
I however compare it to Facebook and such where people often measure their value by how many they have on those lists, even if they've talked with maybe 10% more then once.
For Sunny. Why do guys go out to the bar and try to score with a different woman each night? Why do I have to fend off diesel dykes who think femme=bitch? I personally think it's a mental issue on their part, a hole in their heart/mind/soul that they are trying to fill with other people.
Whatever it is though it's a sadly common condition.
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Im just worried about what may happen if you decide you don't wan that person as a "Spouse" anymore. Do you get a virtual divorce? It just seems to bring up questions that could be better answered if the category were renamed.
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Much like if you remove someone from your friends or lovers list. Some will freak out and demand an explanation, while others will accept that if that's the feeling then that's the feeling. I see it more as a matter of the person rather then the title they happen to we wearing.
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Lol, "diesel dykes" I haven't that expression before, I wonder if they would be surprised if the apparent "bitch" had a dick. ::)
I have heard the expression "lipstick lesbian" though.
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Think of diesel dyke as the exact opposite of a lipstick lesbian.
A close, equally annoying cousin of theirs is the lesbag. They actually look like the male douchebag, because the baggy clothing that is almost a prerequisite of douchbaggery hides most all of their female features while they try to tell me how much they appreciate mine. ::)
It's why I don't go out as much as many my age do... I'd probably loose my faith in humanity if I spent too much time out in it. :P
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I think I like lipstick lesbians more if I had to choose, didn't know about lesbags either.
I usually go out in regular clubs with my friends. I don't know of any alternate sexuality bars around here, guess this town is a bit too small.
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WOW, I'm learning new stuff each day with you guys and I thought I was close to being up to date. lol
I have had ppl ask me why I ended the friendship and had no problem explaining. Some understand and we are still friends, say hi whenever we see each other. Others didn't get it and I don't care, because a friend would understand, would get it. I have been removed from lists and all I did was send a message, "Hey noticed you said goodbye, but just so you know you can always say Hi, cause once a friend always a friend no matter if your on the list or not. :)" and they always greet me.
Now had a two spouses before my Sweety and we were more best friends. I had them on my spouse cause they are the first ppl I wanted to say Hi to and see what was up, trying to look for their names threw my friends list(when I had a long list) was a major pain.
Now only Janine is on my list and I won't be adding anyone else, because she is a lil bit more. :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
But if she ever would end it, I would respect that. Just hope she would keep me as a friend. Sometimes you have to do what you have to do, even if you fear what will happen.
PS. I don't see spouse as owning. I don't own her and I don't want to. She looks beautiful flying free.
Some ppl just NEED to own and have more, think its a insecure issue if you ask me.
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You two are so sweet, makes me smile reading yours words about each other. :)
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You're stuck with me. :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
As far the rest of the topic... it seems a natural part of fun that some jack ass will eventually come along and try to take it too far, but that's their fault not the thing they are taking too far.
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wow,...beautiful sinnnn...
honestly don't understand multiple active spouses,...figured it should be reserved for those who are head and shoulders above the rest.
Part of this discussion,...ponders,....what of the issues of the "secret" society of the lists
We haven't spoken of these viewpoints in months,..much new blood here...
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just so you guys are aware, if you posted in this thread I own you
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lol, good luck with that Unhealer, lol
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you can go ahead and put that in your tag :D no rules or anything, just dont eat from the candy tree
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Hahahaha so funny as I tighten your choke collar some more ! Kneel baby !!! LOL Way too funny !
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*raises an eyebrow
Unhealer, I'll take it as your attempt on on the women....I'm hetero
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then I especially own you bear, put that in your tag or suffer the consequences
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We have a secret society on the lists? Why didn't anyone tell me? And no "It's a secret" doesn't count as an answer. :P
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its on a need to know basis janine
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well I need to know so I can avoid the hell out of it. that list just don't seem safe. :P
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Wow I could start some sort of conspiracy rumor going ,...but meant Secret Friends,...Secret Lovers etc....
Rather run with the conspiracy angle though...
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Oh! I've always considered that "Secret" such a waste I don't even think of it normally.
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its so your wives dont find out about eachother... although if they do you may have to start a religion *cough*joseph smith*cough*cough*