AChat Forum
Discussions about AChat => Share your creative ideas => Topic started by: Superman777 on January 21, 2011, 10:53:34 PM
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I recently had an encounter with a female (at least i think she is) on the game. When we initially met, she was all about being straight. She even went so far as to tell me she was not gay, not at all. I believed her, not that it matters to me what sexual orientation she chooses to be... because it doesn't. We continued talking and playing around for about a week or two, and though our conversations it came out that she had feelings for women and had relationships in the past and had feelings for one in the present.
All of the sudden her orientation from her profile changed from "straight" to "bi" . she claimed it was because she was just curious about the game, but when she asked me to help her find a "real woman" and then to join her in a mff, things suddenly became very clear. it was like she became a completely different person with a woman. she acted like it would be a one time expeience, but from observing how much she enjoyed it versus with me, i could tell she was hiding something. However after this experience she went back to being "straight" . she claimed she would never do another mff again because of this "horrible" experience. she said this even though during the entire mff she could not stop telling the other girl how much she wanted to get a room alone with her. talk about full of it. however she is now currently "bi" once again. so much for the "horrible" experience. all of this happened within the span of less than a week. if you need to change it that often, you have issues. who knows how many times she will change it in the next week. i doubt she will after reading this. stop messing with people's heads and make up your mind.
Is it just me, or is it kinda ridiculous and annoying that some people cant make up their mind or are just too ashamed or afraid that the keep it "undercover". I think you should be only be allowed to choose your orientation once, when you sign up. after that you should have to stay with that you have. let me know what you all think about this.
And to the "undercover " girl , and you know who you are. Please stop. Its annoying. Thanks.
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A. Some people do it in order to filter out annoyances of certain genders. Like women who selected "homo" in order to filter out overly persistent men.
B. It HAS no actual impact on rooming. I'm gay and could room with a man (though I'd probably be distracted by the head injury I suffered :P), and straight women are quite welcome to room with me (and I mean that ladies I truly do :-* ;) ;D :P).
C. Sexual Orientation is far more then three choices in real life. The best scale I know of is 1-10 (1=completely het, 10 completely gay) so there are women who may be a 7-8 on that scale who PREFER sex with women, but occasionally enjoy sex with men. So what would she have to choose?
D. It's not that easy for those who are still finding where they fall on the scale. Especially when they find themselves with desires that they may have been raised to see as wrong. It could very well be that the woman in question doesn't WANT to enjoy it, but still does, and is in conflict.
E. Try to remember that this is a game, and while it's a real person on the other end it's not a person you are going to see or know. (Yeah there could be an exception, but it's a very outside chance sort of thing.)
F. Straight or Bi she's willing to have sex with you. So is this such a huge problem? I mean if you are okay with her having sex with other men then you shouldn't have much of a problem with her having sex with other women. If you aren't okay with her having sex with other men then it's more than a matter of orientation.
G. If it's upsetting you this much you may want to follow Caramel's advice and simply step back from them. My advice would be calling them out on it is almost certainly NOT going to have any positive impact.
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Absolutely, but the question has been raised before, and the consensus that was reached then was that no one wanted the level of identity verification that assuring everyone was their respective genders would entail.
If anything it would damage the game as people want a certain degree of anonymity when it comes to cybersex.
The other key point being that real women can be annoying/crude/aggressive/etc too, and in the end it's going to be about the individual, good or bad.
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Well,..does a guy rooming with a shemale go from hetero to bi? Know a huge number of men who do not think that through. Honestly think the designation is merely preference not a black and white issue.
,...and i like the sliding scale concept,...
Caramel',..lol,..try not to think too much of the sinister forces,...one reason why I try to weed out prospective partners by chat.
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I like having fun , but I`m straight as can be , Canada is pretty relaxed with the gay community . The girls that hit on me , I`ll joke and talk w them . I even introduce them to each other ! ok theres a method on my madness > get them hooked up w someone like them ! SO they stop tryng to convert me ! LADY`S WONT HAPPEN ! I like a real HE man ! Give me that vertical stick !!!!!!!!! LOL
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I think its a matter of how the guy wants to have sex with the shemale, if he's mostly interested in sucking her dick and get fucked by her he should consider actually being bi. I for one actually prefer my guys to be hetero and to treat me like a woman but I don't go around hitting on them since its not very nice... at least not too much. :P
I would also say that some women that wants to room with a shemale here (I guess its mostly out of curiosity) are in fact quite hetero. They just want me to perform like a guy which is quite confusing to me. They could of course do it another way with real women... I don't know.
Anyway I don't think people should just get one choice in the matter here as AChat provides a great place for exploring ones sexuality.
@Janine, lol... head injury. :D
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Actually Bear if I'm remembering right it's official title is the "Kinsey Scale" because it was created by the Kinsey Institute in the 70's when they went and started researching those naughty things no one ever talked about.
Yeah, as a geek girl coming to grips with her sexuality I did research. :P
As far as shemales... even they have had a wide range of where and how they view their spots on the scale, and Adera sweetie you have been wonderful for insights into those mental mechanics. In this case however it was a (presumably) straight guy and a girl who seems to be having trouble knowing where she fits.
So while I kept it focused there the mechanic IS fairly constant across that whole scale. A person has to find for them self where they fall on it, and under the right circumstances (yeah like the aforementioned head injury ;)) that position may change.
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Superman, did you ask her about this? Possible the easiest and first thing to do - perhaps she really is searching her orientation (here or for real life).
Maybe she is just friendly and doesn't wanna hurt your feelings when she is telling you she is straight?
This forum is open for everything and we like to talk and discuss about everything. But we never should forget first to talk with the effected people.
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C. Sexual Orientation is far more then three choices in real life. The best scale I know of is 1-10 (1=completely het, 10 completely gay) so there are women who may be a 7-8 on that scale who PREFER sex with women, but occasionally enjoy sex with men. So what would she have to choose?
Actually there exists more than 2 genders, and im not just talking shemales. there are 2 biological genders for the most part, and then psychologically there are probably 6, I think that makes 36 possible orientations. where someone can like 1-6 different genders, which i think are cisgender male, cisgender female, transgender male, transgender female, and then the people who kind of fit under both (bigender? I dunno)
the biology tends to get in the way for several reasons, but LOTS of guys are into transgender females more than cisgender females
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not sure if it would be 5 or 6, because theres only one possible gender where a person is both male and female in their mind, but I suppose it would effect males and females differently.
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A valid enough point Unhealer, though I must admit I haven't heard the figures you are speaking of. For me I boiled it do to Heterosexual=Attracted to the opposite gender. Homosexual=Attracted to the same gender. Bisexual=Attracted to both genders. The one to ten fell along those three.
BUT as my post asking for shemale views on orientation showed there is a much wider range.
Again though, I wanted to keep it to this case rather then take it too far afield.
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I don't think gender has anything to do with sexual orientation.. It's just a way to specify more..
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problem is that those 3 oversimplify the hell out of it, bisexuals end up getting discriminated against because people think of them as omnisexuals and pansexuals end up getting called asexual or something. Me being "hetero" gets me called gay a lot because i dont like manwomen (giant part of the female population) which are hard to explain but essentially it feels like they have an invisible penis that they like to smack guys with. (I attract them; I think im a bigender or something) I think cisgender females are okay but if im right they go after cisgender males usually
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Knsey's report shook society when it first came out,..and pretty much models the simplified male/female views down to simple biological categories.
Unhealer your thoughts here are provoking of consideration. Been awhile since I have read of the cis-gender issue,..was never formally defined though that may have changed over the years. Certainly it should be considered, in the scheme of discussion...however I think it reflects more to style of play then orientation.
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im sure if the operations and stuff advance more it will be a lot more literal aha
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I think the problem is that while it's simplified it's also codified. Once two people are familiar with the scale they can speak and know they are discussing roughly the same thing.
What you guys are discussing seems to be more on the specifics of the interactions. Like how you're talking about your specific interactions with specific types of women Unhealer. So Kinsey may be simplified, but honestly biology is a certainty, psychology is so much gray area.
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Honestly I never considered myself bi. Guess I just don't like labels, I am who I am. I do lean more towards men than woman, only for the reason that I don't run into alot woman that are interested in woman. To me gay is natural thing, same as hetero, its a choice more a perference that is permanent for some and switchable for others.
For those that have to have that label and ppl that needs to label them. You just have to decide WHAT makes YOU comfortable, What do you really perfer. Don't worry bout what society thinks of your, or family, go with what will make you happy. You have some confused cause they worry bout what others think of them.
If your not sure, experiment. Thats one of the good things about Achat, it doesn't limit you with just 2 choices(hetero or gay).
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That was what was nice about the Kinsey Scale,...gave enough variance to the choices,..not perfect but a decent and simple model to start with.
And most peeps have a preference...
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When you get down to it language itself is an approximation. People get together and decide on common meanings for words, but even then over time those meanings so change. So yeah, Kinsey just gave us a common language.
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my brother is a nice guy, good looking, fantastic lover, they say. But he cannot make achat work for him.
If he clicks "female" in search, he gets zillions of opportunities. If he clicks "female - hetero", he might get 3 if he's lucky.
The conclusion? 99.99999% of girls here are lesbians.
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@ Knickerless ....................... OMG never thought of it ! I have 5 brothers and 3 sisters ! I have even 1 gay brother I `m close too . I know for a fact none of them , would be here . being they vote me the family pervert last summer ! ahh about your brother ? hehehe
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Or Bi, still I'll be the last to complain. ;D
AChat however is a wonderfully unique environment where people can satisfy their curiosities in a safe fashion. So more then a few women prefer to keep their options open and list Bi so they can room with whomever strikes their fancy.
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I've found that there is no way to guage how people will react when it comes to homosexuality. Wether you are bi or straight makes no difference. I don't want to mislead people, but until I can tell how I will be accpepted by a person or a group of people, I choose to go with the status quo. I know that this can cause problems for some later. But if I just start telling everyone that I am bisexual to begin with, I run the risk of not beign accepted before anyone even talks to me. I know this may not be the best way to handle my sexuality, but unitl someone prints a handbook on how to be bisexual, it will have to do.
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The all too sad truth is that there are a sorry number of gays who will also take issue with bisexuals. I can't say I've argued with all of them, but I've argued with all I've met, because while homophobia is becoming less and less acceptable bisexual is still a fairly open target to both sides.
It's sad, but it's true, and I don't blame you one damn bit Christina.
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The trickiest thing to find out is the sexuality of a homo or hetero transsexual/shemale, things can get complicated when the genders are being blurred. :P
I tend to identify myself as a female in this case but that's not the case for all and some might not identify themselves with either. I've seen some shemales online which profiles says they're hetero and that always amuses me because it doesn't tell me shit about their preferences. ;D
If I where to generalize and really label what I don't find exciting in the bed I guess it would be gay men and hetero women. But I don't want to limit myself in such a manner as I'm far more interested in the person firstly.
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As far as I'm concerned Adera, you are one of the girls. ;D
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Of course she is. :)
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Thanks girls. *hugs*
We should have a sleepover and do things like search for the hosts sex toys, paint everyones nails pink and all the other fun stuff we can think off. ;D
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Ohhh can I come? I want to come?
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Of course Sinnnn, if you don't I'm going to lure you with the image of Janine in a nighty or a pyjamas. Oops I might give you images now ehehe. ;D
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I think I just fucked a 50 year old woman.... would have been fine if she didnt mention she was 50 during like 22 times
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Well the way some lie about their age maybe she was 70 and trying to convince herself she was younger
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meh wasnt for me, the language barrier was pretty bad and she kept referring to herself as an old slut with and old pussy... I hope I didnt get dust burn or something
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omg, rotfl.
Was going to say the older the berry....etc., but I am going to just leave this one alone. ;D
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I'm too young for this game
By which I mean I'm a hell of a lot younger than most people on here
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@ Unhealer ........... hahahaha sorry guy ! So the saying > Older the wine - better the taste ! didn`t apply here ? I had a guy tell me he was 12 yrs old that freaked me out ! I could even think of going there ! He told me his anut was doing him ! Yuck !
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Ewwwww.
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@sunny Not only that, but you could get in alot of trouble for even talking to him. Too bad you couldn't get his phone number and call his parents. They should be keeping a better watch on what he does online. >:(
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yeah 12 is a little too young... when I was 16 the worst I would do was look at bikinis
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ALWAYS up for a good slumber party. ;D
As far as the fifty year old, there are some truly gorgeous older women out there... that said the way you are describing this women Unhealer she was not one of them. I remember looking for one of those Polite Excuses were talking about in that other thread when a woman I was with was calling herself a cheap slut and the like, because I am not into degradation.
If you need that you need that, but if you proceed to give it to yourself in the room with me it destroys my mood while making yours.
It still needs to be said though that one of the things I adore about AChat is that 50 year old woman can have a fit and toned young body (her avatar) and be sexual in ways she may not otherwise be able to.
And of course the 12 is just wrong. We've talked about ageplay more then a few times, but without the disclaimer even if you are really that 50 and claiming to be 12 you are putting your partner in danger of legal repercussion.
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12 is far too young. I had my eyes on the hot developed guys when I was 16, didn't care much for the girls as I was mostly jealous of them and I got mistaken for being 13. ::)
Hmm I wonder where the slumber party's at? :P
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and thats why binary terms like bisexual dont always work
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No term will ever always work, but we still need them for verbal communication above the level of grunting.
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ughhhh
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And we humans seems to just love categorizing things.
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taxonomy
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Classification is just a tool. It's up to us as to how we use it. Whether it be to speed up communication, share ideas and build connections or to isolate and control is because of us.
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grawl
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@Adera
Its at this 5star hotel. I booked the room. So "Come into my palor. Pillow fight is bout to began" ;D ;)
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Should we be moving this to Erotic Fantasies? ;)
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can I come? :o
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@Unhealer: Its a girls slumber party.
Hmm 5 star hotel now that sounds good, then my curiosity won't have me looking into drawers. I wonder if there is a jacuzzi (I always forget how that word is spelled, started with "yaku"... waaait that is the Japanese mob :P).
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Of couse there is a jacuzzzi and a sauna, too. A cup with fresh fruits, some mineral water and champagne. A big round bed in the middle of the sleeping room, a nice sofa and a big glass table in the living room.
You also can be sure, no one is disturbing you ;)
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Ok Unhealer, you can come. But only if we get to paint your fingernails and wax your bikini area. ;D
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Oh, maybe someone should bring some crazy toys that makes you wide eyed just seeing them.
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Hmmm, let me look through my toybox and see what I can find.....
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Maybe you should let him feel the toys, hehe
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Ahaha no guys this time, I want the girl talk. :)
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Ok Unhealer, you can come. But only if we get to paint your fingernails and wax your bikini area. ;D
wouldnt be the first time
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@Unhealer
I almost want to ask but something keeps saying "You don't want to know, RUN"
I want a pillow fight, with feathers flying all over. And the scary stories told round the fire(oh is that camping?). I one had one sleep over in my life, one girl pissed on my ragedy ann blanket, another threw up in the popcorn(didn't tell anyone ewww), and all of them was inviting boys up and blamed me when they showed up. :P
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That was always my problem. It SOUNDS wonderful, roomful of girls. The problem was those girls kept inviting boys over, and by the time I knew why I never got the reason why I knew not to explain i didn't get the reason why. :P
All that said camping or sleepover you can always share my sleeping bag Sinnnn, and any bodily fluids will occur because of your talented tongue and equally skilled fingers. :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
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We can have fun with the boys some other time, its not like I can't invite one home some other time. ;)
I'm going to bring a silly big dildo, its about as thick as my thigh and no you can't get it in you... fun looking at though.
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How about two really big beds or something?
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So IS this something we want to do?
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Yes I want to, jumping onto the bed bouncing around giggling. At least while we think of what to do in the fantasy for everyone, we need a good idea for that one.
I think I'll get to see Janines Weak Spots 101 wide eyed and hugging a pillow to my chest. ::)
I'll have to shop for a pyjamas, I'm usually just sleeping in panties and a nighty and if its too warm I loose the nighty.
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I sure hope its kind of cold. COMFY FLANNEL JAMMIES!! :D
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My profile clearly states that I am hetero (which I am in real life as well as here) but I get invited aby at least a dozen females every day. Hopefully, I will soon run out of females because I simply add them all to my ignore list.
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Cold invites are no fun at all. Knickerless, I hope you don't ignore the girls that just want to chat with you.
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Well the guys can start their own thread while the girls are away, down at the saloonl shooting billiards,...knickerless you are welcome to join us. ;)
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Shooting pool, playing darts, poker... I am game... a nice waitress in a short skirt, tending to all out needs... ;)
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Hey I vote for the sleep-over. No Guys Allowed-Enter at your own Risk
So just got to know how to start it.
Honestly know one really pays attention to your preferences. I have put on my profile gay, hoping it would cut down on the guys-Hell No. Was hetero for awhile-still got hits from different sexes. I was just hoping to cut down on the hits. That dream so was not a realistic one. :P :P :P
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I want to have the pyjama party, looking forward to the girl time. I was thinking I could have a pyjama with shorts and a tank top... could take pyjama pants also. Sinnnn, I don't want to start it... I want to arrive. :D
Pool is fun if I can cheat with a really tight, short, figure hugging dress and a pair of really high heels. Sit on the edge of the table chalking the stick so the guy shooting has my butt in his line of sight. When I shoot I bend over sexily, my dress riding up, my breasts almost falling out from it, take my time, brush my hair from my face and pout my mouth as I'm aiming. I tend to get the advantage then. :P
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Bear, where is the saloon? Tell me time and place and I'll be there. I am a gamer like Tight (think he meant gamer and not game ;) )
Sorry Adera, no pool for you - you are at the pyjama party :P
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FYI Lover,...Tight used it correctly...to say "I am game" is to mean "I am willing to participate", your use of "gamer " is like saying "I am a player", both correct of intent... :)
and so concludes today's English lesson, unless some one wants to mess with the teacher... :P
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Sitting in the front seat sucking on my pencil in my far to short skirt, whispering to Christina "I heard him say he was a player" then giggling. As Bears eyes turn to me I look at him with innocence.
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I`m the quite one in the the back of the room ! day dreaming ! About a pool game down at the pool hall ! Hanging out w a bunch of guys ! Thats fun ! I was told it`s cheating leaning into the table w my left leg rested up on the side of the table ! And distraction low cleavage , hehehe ;) Fav past time hooky !
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Sneakily I text Sunny "Mr Bear said he was a player :P". Glancing back at her seeing her day dreaming... probably about how she's going to tease those poor guys in pool... I don't think they did one good shot last time. Her message tone suddenly goes off, oh shit... Sunny... you should have it on silent. :P
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Thanks Bear, a free lesson :)
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@Islandsun: as far as i know, it is cheating of both feet leave the floor (wonder how you would be putting a ball, and how your skirt would slide up), so resting one leg up on the table, isn't cheating... A low cleavage will distract guys, but if you can't stand the heat, don't play in the kitchen...lol
Bear, where is the poolhall?
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eating aint cheating
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@Tight *grins...think we need an erotic thread on this?
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2 cues, a table and some balls...
@ Islandsun: have your cleavage as low as you like, but be careful it doesn't end up as a pocket ;)
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Hahahaha ! Rack up those balls ! Boys ! And chauk up your sticks ! lol ;) AT first I pretend I don`t know what I`m doing . Then when bets are are all on ! I`ll wipe the table clean ! hahaha ! Pulling up the end of the pool cue , to my lips , blowing on the end of it , like it is a smoking gun ! lol who`s gun ? .> GRIN<
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First one is a give away, to make you feel comfortable and confident. Then you'll be wiped away and maybe you'll have to blow on the end of our cues... ;)
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@ Tightfit74 > Red ball > RIGHT CORNER POCKET ! And I never had any one complain ! The way I shoot pool ! ;D I think you made that rule up ! lol
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@ Islandsun It's not a rule, it's a strategy... But it depends on the wager... ;)
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@ Tightfit oh sorry didnt read it right ! so I have too leave 1 foot on the floor ? Hmm lets see wager I bet you and Bear can come up w something
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@ Bear: shall we discuss stakes and conditions?
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@ Adera > oh man new cell ph ; what was the text > psst plz tell is it about teacher ?
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@Sunny: The message was "Mr Bear said he was a player :P".
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@Tight....sorry my mind kind of wandered. I was reading on a different thread of sunny's comments about lying naked on a bear...not certain what the rest was about since my mind drifted off into fantasy land at that point...what were we talking about?
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@ Bear: Sunny wants to play pool, states she can clear the table and whipe us away... I told her she might reconsider once we let her win the first game, then show her how it's played... A bet is about to be made, and we are asked to set the stakes...
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@ Tightfit74 Let me win ! I`M laffin > typical male ! :D :D :D
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@ Islandsun I might be bragging, or i might not... Idl take that bet if you are that confident... ;)
P.S. call me Tight?
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@ Tight very confident ! psst ! tell you a secret >good things come in small packages ;D like dynamite ! hahaha !
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@ Sunny then put your money where your mouth is. Curious to see how you grip a cue... ;)
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@Tight Depents on how the balls break ! using left thumb and fore finger ! ;D and money honey doesnt work ! lol
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That's the grip for the tip.. I assume you know how to hold the base, don't you? And I know money doesn't work.. what would get you interested? Hmmm?
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@ Tight hehee Again depends on lay out of the break ! might have to tighly grip the base of the pole ,or or a light soft stroke ! ;)
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Sunny, I see you have your cue-techniques under control.. Wonder how you handle the balls, and those deep, narrow pockets... Oh right, we were taling pool, not snooker..
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@ Tight oh wanted to ask does tight mean for tight ass hahahahhaha sorry devil made me do it ! oh and what the heck is snooker ?
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in India by an English The backgroundstory of my Avatar name wil not be discussed publically.. ;D Snooker is an English billiards game, invented in India by Sir Neville chamberlain. And somewhat more complicated and difficult as pool..
(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/9/95/Snooker_table_drawing_2.svg/315px-Snooker_table_drawing_2.svg.png)
(http://imgtn1.qbyrd.com/ts?t=17558808823470406557&pid=23296&ppid=15)
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Hm, thought I do know about snooker and pool. But never had this hot hole when I played it ;)
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@Tight ;D hahahaha ! You gave me the ideal how to win all my pool games ! And watch that pool cue buddy ! Snooker does look interesting !LOL
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And the holes are so tight in snooker...
It will be difficult to defeat you this way Sunny, if you show up like that... ;D
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hehehe ! I`ll keep my cowboy hat on ;D
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I am sure leaving your hat on, will make a BIG difference...
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::) Ok I`ll wear my fantastic >>GRIN << too ! ;D hahaha And good morning everyone !
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God day from over here. :P
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@Adera hey there ! Hope your day is going well ! lol I broke down and bought the rose back ground ! ;D
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@ Sunny I guess I'll just have to bring my best game to be able to beat you. Can't think of anything to distract your mind with. Unless... I use my.. ahum.. as my cue... ;D
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Good morning everyone ! Smiles to you`s from a smalle island ! ;D @ Tight ! LOL I noticed you chocked the end up ! hahahha ! Give me your best shot ! lol !