*** This forum was active till April, 2021. Now it is read-only, please use the New forum! ***

+  AChat Forum
|-+  Discussions about sex
| |-+  Everything about sex and love (Moderators: Lover, Brandybee, jayc, Nat33)
| | |-+  Trying to clarify my toughs....
« previous next »
: 1 [2]
: Trying to clarify my toughs....  ( 14425 )
Bear
Hero Member
*****
: 3856



« #15 : May 23, 2012, 09:14:41 AM »

HB I think many fine views have been expressed here.. but Lover has probably nailed the critical part. That aspect of a change in your view of your sexuality. The shock of the possibility of translating the experiences from the VR to your RL in orientation. Discovering the fantasy play a possibility into your RL experience... well my friend... slow and easy on that is my opinion. Perhaps exposing yourself to an alternate community in RL may help with that self discovery.

I read that surprise in your words of this new discovery of possibility. The choice is neither right or wrong.... just a shock, for the moment

I see the only danger being an  impetuous choices, which might lead you down a path later regretted. Take that deep breath.... openly embrace those feelings and find out if they truly reflect the inner desires of your heart in terms of sexuality.

As to your friend.... well if he is a true friend he will give you the time for that discovery.

hentaiboy69
Hero Member
*****
: 7883



« #16 : May 23, 2012, 10:07:32 AM »

Indeed, Bear.....lot of good suggestion from everyone and i whant to thanks everyone for your efford....i really appreciated it, really nice and amazing friends of this forum.

but re-reading here and there, i think West69 had hit the point whit those words:
  •    * Finally, and again this is just me talking to myself, I would ask if I want A relationship
         or this particular relationship. Just because I have discovered that I am attracted to men
         doesn't mean THIS particular man would be a good start. What does i mean that I have
         told this person several times, "No.", but he keeps ignoring my wishes. I might be
         tempted to give him credit for perseverance, but since I am a skeptical person, I might
         wonder if he would accept my admonition of "No" when we are exploring a sexual act.
         If I am not ready, I want the power to decide, not be forced. Also, If I were pursuing a
         relationship, would the first picture I send a stranger be of my genitals. Does a person
         of this type want a "relationship" with me as a person, or quick sexual gratification.
         If I decide that sex is all I want, then OK, it is my decision. However, I won't delude
         myself into thinking that if I go to meet a guy who sent me a photo of his cock, that he
         is interested in my career, my family, my hopes, etc.
Even if he said i'm special for him, and i think he is a nice man for how i know him, in my mind it's more like phisically attraction then love at the moment......maybe more like "curiosity" (even if it's not the right word....i can't deny it was exciting) about this aspect of sexuality and i'm tempted to explore it.

I need to talk more whit him, trying to find out what both of us are expecting about an eventually real meeting......if it's a "one touch and go" (rude to say, but it happend) or something different, more intense, to share togheter.

Only time can give to me the right answer, i know it really good, and i'll gonna take it
« : May 23, 2012, 10:38:37 AM hentaiboy69 »

james_dean
Full Member
***
: 128


Tonight, it's bottoms up!


« #17 : May 23, 2012, 01:10:11 PM »

HB,
I know it took a lot of strength to post your feelings.  Kudos for that!  There is a lot of good advice in this thread.  I just have to add..  Be careful and trust your feelings.  If something seems wrong, then it just might be.  But if it feels right in your heart and soul, then you should be free to act on your feelings.  Good luck! :)


Live... Laugh... Love...    OR..   Load..   Aim..  Shoot!
hentaiboy69
Hero Member
*****
: 7883



« #18 : May 25, 2012, 02:18:22 AM »

We had talk more yesterday and i had explain him i'm not sure if what i feel for him is really love.....i consider him a really special friend, but my feeling are so fragile...i can't, or i wan't maybe, trust peoples till the end, cause i had really really few real friends in my life and now they are away for work and i can't see them so often. all the others, well, i don't call them really friends....it's so sad!

anyway, the impression i have is he really care (he repeat every time we met he love me and he is nice whit me) of me and seems he don't want to play whit my feeling (well, this is what he said), but for me is earlie......i need time, a lot maybe, and maybe one day i can take the right decision.

kittenlepurr
Sr. Member
****
: 280



« #19 : May 31, 2012, 02:27:52 PM »

If i may offer my own advice for you HB :).

First of all -applauds- For you putting yourself out there.

When I am uncertain about my feelings I usually find a way of working it out.

First I ask myself the simple questions.

How do I feel about this person ? I do not think in detail but think for the first answer because its more often the true one.
How does he/she feel about me ? Harder to answer unless they clearly state it which he has for you.
What do I think of him/her as ? Based on the other two questions.
Will the other person accept a slow approach? Thats the question thats very important... you will be able to work out all of them over time as long as they have patience.

All I suggest though is for you to be very honest to yourself and him. Go with your instinctual feeling .. if it feels right then it usually is or you will know quickly that it is not.

I wish you the best of luck. We will be here if you want to bounce ideas off us.
West69
Full Member
***
: 123


« #20 : June 03, 2012, 09:12:33 AM »

......my feeling are so fragile...i can't, or i wan't maybe, trust peoples till the end........
.i need time, a lot maybe, and maybe one day i can take the right decision.

While a rose can be appreciated from a distance, you must pick it and hold it close to revel in its' fragrance. Some never try for fear of pricking their fingers on it's thorns.
When your time is right, you will know it. Wear gloves my dear, but don't hesitate. Far better to cautiously brave the thorns than ignore the rose, letting it wither on the vine, never embracing it's sweet opportunity.

You are a gardener with courage. I hope Life rewards you with a bouquet. :)
james_dean
Full Member
***
: 128


Tonight, it's bottoms up!


« #21 : June 12, 2012, 10:06:24 AM »

@West.   Well said!  ;)

Live... Laugh... Love...    OR..   Load..   Aim..  Shoot!
: 1 [2]  
« previous next »
: