What is the difference between a slave, a submissive and a pet?
This is a question I get asked often. I will try and explain it the best way I can.
Autonomy means independence or freedom, as of the will or one’s actions.
The autonomy of the individual.
So the difference between a pet, a sub and a slave is their Autonomy.
Each of the three will have a Master, or are in the process of looking for one.
Each of them will know their place and if disobedient may be punished accordingly when they are out of line.
But it is also the Master’s responsibility to make their underlings (pet, sub, slave ) feel loved and desired and needed and wanted and to train them to understand and obey in their role and not to neglect them.
Other Masters or Mistresses should be addressed as Sir or Mistress.
A slave should address all free persons as Sir or Mistress.
Pets and Slaves are referred to as It, unless given a name by their owner. Each owner can change it.
A submissive is referred to as his or her or her given name.
Most Dominants before playing with owned pets, subs or slaves will either ensure they are free to play or seek the blessing of the owner.
They will know they are owned as most will wear a collar.
The Dominants should find out if it is decoration by asking the underling.
An underling can be punished if they lie.
A pet, sub or slave desire the happiness of their owner at all times.
Those that do not desire their Masters or Mistresses happiness is doing it Wrong. Full Stop (Period).
Pet -Pets are submissive but with more freedom than the other two. This is usually the first step in being controlled by a Master or Mistress. It is the favourite of all three to become involved in.
They may, on occasions, depending on the pet, take on the characteristics of animal pets, wearing tails ; ears ; even dress in costumes and of course learn obedience.
Pets have a great deal of Autonomy, depending on their Master. They may have anywhere from 80-99% free reign, though they know they can be called at any time, for any purpose. When called, it must respond to it’s owner as soon as possible.
With such freedom, can come Responsibility too. The responsibility to occupy one’s own time when their Master is occupied. They can act independently, for example buying clothing they think their Master or Mistress might like.
They are treated as a pet would be. Think of your pet dog or cat. When it is with its owner, their Master or Mistress can groom them, take them to the toilet, feed them in their feeding bowls or even feed from the hand to the pets mouth, put them to bed in a cage or pet bed, show off their training – sit, beg, sexual things etc.. give tit bits as treats, walk them around in a collar and lead, tell them what to wear, teach them to heel and of course use them for sexual pleasures. The boundaries are negotiated by the Master & Pet and agreements made by both.
Sub- Subs are submissives that devote themselves only to their Master/Mistress. This is step 2 of the kink and lots will never move on to step 3.
When the sub's Owners are not about they are free persons with agreed boundaries of course. They must not ever embarrass their Master or Mistress.
They do not answer to other Dominants and are free to roam.
They do however address other Dominants as Sir or Mistress.
A sub has some Autonomy though not nearly as much as a pet, perhaps 40-60% depending on the Master.
As with a Pet, even though the sub might be in the middle of something, he or she must respond to the call of his or her Master or Mistress as soon as possible.
It is also easier for a sub to manage their own time while their Master is occupied because the Master of a sub is responsible for giving it enough to do to not worry about it.
The Master or Mistress may give the submissive tasks to do. It may be sexual – lend them to others; instruct them to do Group ; maybe to read up on a subject or answer posts / stories in forum and even instructions to play in their free time.
They can act independently, learning & buying things their Master or Mistress might like.
Slave -While all in the lifestyle are free persons who chose to serve, slaves give this up and are without rights.
This is Step 3 and the extreme play of a submissive.
Their every waking hour (by this we mean every moment on line) is devoted to their Master/Mistress.
They must seek permission for doing most things and are generally limited to the room their Owner resides in.
They are treated as subservient by other Masters and Mistresses and are expected to show the highest forms of respect towards all.
A slave, by definition, has no Autonomy whatsoever.
Its only desire is to fulfil every wish, every whim, every pleasure of it’s Master or Mistress.
A Master or Mistress looking for a slave, must therefore dedicate himself to managing his slaves time very well.
They often refer to the slave as "boy" or "gir"l or any name the owner may choose.
The slave is not free to do anything on its own without permission or blessing of it's Master or Mistress.
The slave is expected to have no desires except to obey it's Master or Mistress.
A slave owns nothing, everything is owned by it's Master or Mistress.
A slave is only as free as it's owner allows. But it's most important thing is to serve it's owner first always.
Pets and submissives’s have more freedom then a slave and are allowed to think for themselves. Slaves have no opinion or view, they obey and are obedient.
The owner controls the slave with love, making them feel loved, wanted and needed.
The slave gives itself freely to it's owner and trusts that their owner has their best interest at heart.
A slave depends on the Master or Mistress to govern it, guide it into knowing what it's Master or Mistress wants.
Once the slave has learnt what is wanted, there is usually the ability and expectation to act pro-actively to please it's owner.
It does not usually think or act for itself except in mundane chores etc.. they must seek permission to shop etc...
They must even ask permission to enter the rooms of it's Owner and even then to speak to it's Master or Mistress.
Some important differences :
A submissive is someone who negotiates; a slave does not
A submissive has limits; a slave has given up all limits except those which it's owner sets for them.
A submissive obeys and serves by choosing to do so each time and retains her will. A slave initially makes a choice to obey it's Master/Mistress at all times and then submits to the will of It's Master or Mistress at all times.
A submissive accepts submission, while a slave accepts obedience.
A submissive has retained some rights within the context of the D/s relationship, whereas a slave has given up all rights and becomes, in effect, property, hence the it.
A submissive is owned, but a slave is possessed. (property)
A slave is not allowed to sit on furniture or wear clothes, and always kneels at it's owner’s feet.
A submissive has a safe-word to end play, while a slave has consented to no-consent.
A slave must be a submissive, but a submissive is not necessarily a slave.
Being a submissive is just a step on the way to the “ultimate” state of submission, which is being a slave.
A slave is more submissive than a “mere” submissive.
Submissives are just playing; slaves live the lifestyle.
A submissive has more self-respect than a slave.
BDSM training questions of underlings. "Tell me what you are?"
"I am a pet, submissive, a slave for a Master."
"What is a slave (pet or submissive) ?"
"A girl who is owned."
"Why do slaves (or submissives) wear brands?"
"To show they are owned."
"Why do you wear a collar?"
"That men and mistresses may know who owns me."
"What does a slave (or submissive) want more than anything else?"
"To please (men,) their own Master or their own Mistress."
Fuck Toy. A Master or Mistress looking for a fuck toy to use whenever the mood strikes would most likely be looking for a Pet.
A pet, sub or slave expects to be used at any time.
A Pet would suit “whenever the mood strikes” as it leaves the pet time to go out shopping, playing, etc… after it's Master or Mistress is done.
A Master or Mistress looking for an "on demand fuck toy" doesn’t want to micro-manage an underling and therefore would be expected to keep itself from getting bored.
A Master that ONLY wants a fuck toy doesn’t want to give it chores like laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc. to do when he or she is not using it for his or her pleasure.
The Master or Mistress of a slave, if (s)he’s doing it right, knows that his or her slave depends on him or her to fill it's time.
Then it would be used for such chores and comforts for it's Master or Mistress, even serving his/her food and drink at meal times.
The Master of a slave will need to micro manage it or will end up with a very bored slave who will eventually become a runaway or go to another Master who will appreciate it.
Similarly, on the other side, a Master of a Pet who is too controlling is encouraging rebellion. They are subservient when it is their Master’s time.
An underlings desire for “autonomy” vs. “being given things to do” can fluctuate in a relationship.
The underling may offer itself as a pet one day, then wish to be more closely directed later, perhaps even craving to be a slave.
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