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Cold invites and conversation

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  • #5331
    Ewell
    Participant

    Hi all. I’m new here so forgive me for starting a topic that’s probably been done to death; but I was interested in people’s opinions.

    OK, on my profile I’ve said basically that I’m open to cold invites (no guarantee I’ll accept them) but would much rather chat first. I have to say I have more cold invites than women trying to start a chat with me, which is interesting.

    Some have been very satisfactory: the inviter has clearly read my profile, introduces herself, and we keep some sort of conversation going in the room. Some have been the opposite: into room, clothes off and at it without so much as a ‘Hi’, and not a word during … not even any sort of indication of how it is for them using the ‘orgasm meter’. Very difficult to know when the job is done, so to speak.

    I’m guessing these are mainly women who speak neither English nor French (the two languages I say I speak … though I could probably get the gist of things in Italian as well). But it is a bit weird. And they are not necessarily free users either.

    Just wondering your experiences were.

    #53852
    Bear
    Participant

    We all experience something like that at one stage or another. The language barrier will certainly limit your experience to a visual encounter, whether that is satisfying to both parties is pretty hard to determine with a silent partner. Some women are locked on the obsession of the “cumfest and expect you to pop off on every pose and smother them in cum. When you accept cold invites you run a crap shoot of an encounter, you are never certain if they have similar interests, understand your language or appreciate the effort you might put into a session. Your chances of a good satisfying encounter diminish with cold invites.

    I would not necessarily avoid them, sometimes you are lucky and find an exceptional partner, but the odds there are fairly remote. I will accept them once in awhile for giggles… one never knows, I’ll know in a short while whether I am getting anything of satisfaction from the encounter, the downside being I could be wasting 5 minutes of my life I will never get back. When we first start I think many most take a fuck anyone approach, some never grow out of it, but others become more selective, focusing on partners who can provide something worthwhile. There is no right or wrong to this this, merely that one gravitates eventually to a particular style of play they are most comfortable with,…finding partners that have mutual interests to maximize sessions.

    Have fun out there,…and remember you are not obligated to suffer a bad session… 8)

    #53853
    WilliamXS
    Participant

    Ewell there been topics about that…some realy good sugestions were there…..made myself one too.

    I hope soon the A-Team will make that easier or more userfriendly about the matter (like goin in to chat with 2,3 or more friends/lovers  or just people you can focus on, so that no colds will disturb your chats) .

    Maybe some day someone has a bright idea too solve this… but I guess realy good  ideas that allready been given end up under a big stack of ideas hehehe.

    Anyway…keep posting stuf.

    #53854
    TightFit74
    Participant

    Welcome Ewell, and a valid post in my opinion.

    As Bear states, most will go with anyone when first starting this game. So have I, couldn't tear myself away from it the first few weeks. But after meeting some amazing women, my style of playing changed and developed over time.
    Though very anxious and in to the animations in those early weeks, I have never accepted cold invites, besides the occasional night where I chose to accept them and put it in my banner. You never know who you will meet. It could be someone that connects to your own wants and needs perfectly.
    But in general, a cold invite offers an unsure outcome and I assume most will be unsatisfactory.
    But as many people, as many tastes. Besides the reasons Bear gave, for people to use cold invites, I can imagine it is a big turn on for some people to just go in a room and have some fun, without talking or getting to know the other one. Haven't we all fantasized about an encounter with a total stranger, where primal lust is the drive to meet?
    For me personally, a cold invite is rude. You could be heavily involved in a conversation with someone and an intrusion like that can be very irritating. Especially for someone that doesn't write short messages (as many do here). I'd rather spend an unsuccesful night on achat, as have 10 disappointing encounters..

    Have fun playing though!

    #53855
    Janine Dee
    Participant

    Ohh, I was a slut when I first found the game. I'll admit that. The problem was that I have a very active imagination, very healthy sex drive, and excellent descriptive skills.

    I started loosing interest in every girl who'd have me as soon as I realized a great many not only couldn't match my level of play, but had little interest to.

    #53856
    SueCB
    Participant

    Hi Ewell and welcome!

    Some interesting stuff in this thread and it seemed like a good place as any to throw in my two cents. I personally HATE cold invites, they are intrusive popping up a damn dialog box when I'm chatting away with others. So I have to stop, click ? and then Ignore and then Decline. Not a big deal one time, but it'll happen countless times in a day (actually I think my max has been 65, and the population of Iggyville keeps growing).

    That said, though, I'll chat with just about anyone as long as they're polite. But sometimes I'm just swamped or with a friend I haven't chatted with in a while and want to catch up … or whatever and so I can't (and don't) answer them all. Sorry guys, it's just that there's a whole lot more of you than there is of me and Friends always get priority chat.

    Skipping language as a barrier (legitimate issue since the Net is global), there's another aspect to the whole point Ewell makes with “I'm guessing these are mainly women who speak neither English nor French (the two languages I say I speak … though I could probably get the gist of things in Italian as well). But it is a bit weird. And they are not necessarily free users either.” I don't know if I'm the first to break it to you, E, but unfortunately there's a lot of POSERS out there too. Guys playing girls and it's not just a AChat thing, it happens just about everywhere on the Net to one extent or other.

    Even allowing for what Jamine Dee said (Yeah, woo let us loose in the candy store, right? lol) you should take those kinds of not interacting, drag you into a room things as a red flag. Even if it's not some poser (and don't ask me why guys do that online, I don't have a psych degree), is that really how you want to interact with someone online? Sorry, banging pixels isn't my thing, because without interaction and sharing a mutual experience, it's wayyyy easier to just get out my vibe and don't bother with typing.

    So really, as far as I'm concerned, that's the thing … it IS a shared experience or should be and it's why I insist on chatting with someone before even considering going in-room with them. Like I'd do that real life, just drag any guy that said “Hi” into my room? Don't think so … at least a little something has to click. So do yourself a favor Ewell and insist on that chatting interaction … so okay, maybe it is in fractured English or pseudo-whatever language, but there should be at least SOME attempt.

    #53857
    Adera
    Participant

    Welcome SueCB. I don't think I get as many colds as a female get, but I get my fare share, so when I do and is busy chatting I tend to just ignore them since there wont be a new invite before that one has timed out. :)

    I have to admit I accepted many colds when I was new to AChat but after the initial novelty cooled of I got more picky with my partners. Its not very fun without any chatting and I don't really care for those that are fishing for cam sessions or pictures via AChat… feels like a very roundabout way if that's what you want.

    I still find it amazing that one guy tried to get around the technical cold invite by saying “Hi”, then immediately after that invite me and then be stupid enough to get upset when I declined him. Really, its not like I'm going accept him because he's found something like a loop hole in a legal clause and think he's witty *sigh*.

    #53858
    Bear
    Participant

    lol.. reminds me when I had “Chat first” on my banner. One women said “hi”  then sent a cold invite… when I responded with a reminder of chat appreciation,… she commented , “well I said “hi'.

    #53859
    hentaiboy69
    Participant

    and u answer “godbye” i suppos……oh well, there's nothingh to do……cold invite is part of the time u spend here (wasting it) when u are not in room…….

    this is a point for a small (dunno how many custemer…maybe 20 max!?) chat room for selected peoples.

    #53860
    SueCB
    Participant

    lol yep, the “Hi” and Invite happens a lot. I guess “Hi” is supposed to pass as chatting.  ;D

    #53861
    Keiko
    Participant

    I know cold invites will never go away, and I'm sure it has already been mentioned before, but it would be better if they were less intrusive.

        I usually talk to my friends with the chat log box expanded so a massive, blood red invite alert box in the center of my screen is a little unsettling.

        I'd prefer a tab or something on the chat box that, when selected, lists a que of pending invites. Perhaps it could flash when you receive a new invite. That way everyone is happy. The cold inviter is satisfied knowing they sent me their request and I don't need to worry about getting slapped in the face by a big red box every couple minutes. Win – win! :)

    #53862
    SueCB
    Participant

    Love that idea, Keiko!

    #53863
    Unhealer
    Participant

    MY penis is large and my blade is swift…

    #53864
    Adera
    Participant

    Is that your Conan style of picking up? :D

    #53865
    Pandora
    Participant

    @ Keiko-“and I don't need to worry about getting slapped in the face by a big red box every couple minutes. Win – win!”

    I read that wrong the first time lol.  😮 Wich made….

    MY penis is large and my blade is swift…

    even funnier  :D

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