Out of the Darkness. Mental Health issues.

Bear, probably this is one of the worst experience a person can live……it's hard when someone we care will die for natural reason, but thinking someone wanna take away his life, is really sad, specially if he is someone so colose to us and we never had seen any sign of his desperation.

pafe, you are perfectly right…..it's hard to accept we can maybe do more for her (or him) before she take the worst decision and it will be hard to pass over it…

it was 2004, i think…….a friend (we wasn't so closed, but i know him till we was 11 or 12) took his life alone, in a car……..for his family and her girlfriend was really hard at that time! for father and mother, it's realy hard to say goodbye to a soon…..they allways hope their soon will have a long and happy life…..so sad, my friends!

I wanna bring some lightness in this important and worthwile topic. It's wonderful to see we also can talk about these serious and (for all who are concerned personally) awful experience in this forum. I can recognize two things:
It's a sign of big trust to the community (which also HB did with his topic). And, though we all are here for fun, the community knows to have fun but also talks about experiences, sad themes, awful incidents. In a special way no one is alone. I appreciate this.

It's so hard if you have to recognize you can't really help, though you do your best. You're asking what else you could have done… and feel guilty, though your brain says you did everything that has been possible… no matter if someone falls into a depression or does suicid…
Unfortunately many of the things we try (with best intention) don't help, but seem to boost the bad feelings of the other person. So my advice for everyone: We hardly can help – we just can try to ask the person to ask for professionell help and also ask for help in institutions that offer help – like the one Bear and Eve posted, the crises line, red cross….

Thanks Bear for starting this thread. It's not just a milestone in AChat forum, but hopefully a big help for everyone. If this thread just can save one life, it's worth to talk about…

My sympathies to you and your family Bear. *hugs*

As a survivor of a suicide attempt and one who still comtemplated it for a few years, I found help through local organizations and local professionals, and one person in particular who latched on to me and wouldn't let go.

I found these two organizations very helpful to me and to others.

http://www.suicidology.org
An excellent site for assistance with every phase of mental depression and suicide.

http://www.suicide.org
Another excellent site that includes phone numbers.

Both of these sites have online help and telephone numbers and they care about you.  They are located in the United States, but I'm sure if anyone contacted them online they would definitely help.

As a survivor of a suicide attempt and one who still comtemplated it for a few years, I found help through local organizations and local professionals, and one person in particular who latched on to me and wouldn't let go.

I'm so glad you survived and that the person who latched on to you never let go. If she hadn't I may not of had the pleasure of meeting you. Something that has been very rewarding and interesting to say the least.

You as well as a few others know about my daughter and the rough time she went through back when she was 13-14 years old. Through the help of professionals and a lot of love from me and her mother, she totally turned her life around and became the remarkable woman she is today. She's going for her Masters and excels at all she puts her mind to.

My sympathy and prayers go out to you and yours Bear. I'm always available to chat with all my friends, and though we've not met, I consider you one from what I have read here from you.. I too have went through a bout of deep depression and a total feeling of worthlessness and hopelessness. I was ready to die and didn't care any more. After surviving two heart attacks it finally dawned on me that I still have unfinished business yet to do.  Luckily I suffered no real heart damage and am as healthy as a horse, just not hung like one. As long as I eat right and exercise I'll live a long and happy life. Both of which I'm doing.

Through perseverance and a few friends here on Achat, I have totally snapped out of a depression that lasted over 2 years and what you see now, here and in person is the true man that I am… Come chat with me sometime..

Thanks for letting me share too…

The problem for each person in darkness: They know there is light. And this is the hardest thing. Knowing there is a better life and  (believing) being unable to reach it.
We can't say “c'mon think positive, look at the good sides of your life” though we want to help, we just increase the bad feelings.

All we can do here is giving addresses for help, listen to, being there if our help is asked for.
Sometimes it's enough to get the feeling of having someone being close, sometimes you need a kick in your ass.  Pondering and too much thinking is dangerous in these moments. Action, doing something, being active is best you can do.

You also can write down your thoughts and worries. There are several ways to handle it. Looking back, realizing most of our fears never become real. Making a plan to avoid those fears come true, burning them in a little ceremony or sending them away – to a special person.