The forums › Quizz, Fav TV, Fav Music, Fav Films, Books… › Funny Finds
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February 7, 2016 at 12:59 am #20932
As soon as I log in!…
February 7, 2016 at 1:09 am #20937
February 8, 2016 at 5:05 am #23320A blind old cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?”
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
“Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things.”The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
The bouncer is a blonde girl with a ‘Billy-Club’.
I’m a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.
The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
“Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy… Do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?”
The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters,
“NO – NOT IF I HAVE TO EXPLAIN IT FIVE TIMES!!!”
February 8, 2016 at 2:28 pm #23322A woman was nagging her husband to cut the grass, to which the husband answered, “What do I look like to you? A landscaper?!”
Next time the sink was dripping, she asked him again, “Honey, can you fix the faucet?” The husband replied, “What do I look like to you? A Plumber?!”
Two days later, a light bulb went out and she begged him again, “Honey, can you change the light bulb?” His reply was, “What am I? An electrician?!”
A few days later, the husband comes home from work to find that the lawn is cut, the faucet is fixed, the light bulb is changed.
Very surprised, he says, “Honey, what happened here?”
The wife replies, “You know our new next door neighbor? He came over and fixed everything.”
The husband says, “Honey, how did you pay him?!”
“Oh, you know,” the wife says, “he told me that I could either bake him a cake or have sex with him.”
Somewhat relieved the husband asks, “Whew, so what kind of a cake did you bake for him?”
The wife replies, “Who do you think I am? Betty Crocker?!”
February 9, 2016 at 12:11 pm #23321
February 9, 2016 at 4:41 pm #23323
February 12, 2016 at 10:03 pm #23324
February 14, 2016 at 11:27 am #23325BlayneSlipknot – Livin' La Vida Loca
February 15, 2016 at 5:09 am #23326On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple is involved in a fatal car accident.
The couple find themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven. While waiting, they begin to wonder: Could they possibly get married in Heaven? When St. Peter showed up, they asked him.
St. Peter said, ‘I don’t know. This is the first time anyone has asked. Let me go find out,’ and he leaves.
The couple sat and waited, and waited. Two months passed and the couple are still waiting. While waiting, they began to wonder what would happen if it didn’t work out; could you get a divorce in heaven. After yet another month, St. Peter finally returns, looking somewhat bedraggled.
‘Yes,’ he informs the couple, ‘you can get married in Heaven.’
‘Great!’ said the couple, ‘But we were just wondering, what if things don’t work out? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven?’
St. Peter, red-faced with anger, slammed his clipboard onto the ground. ‘What’s wrong?’ asked the frightened couple.
‘OH, COME ON!’, St. Peter shouted, ‘It took me three months to find a priest up here! Do you have any idea how long it’ll take me to find a lawyer?’
February 17, 2016 at 9:23 pm #23327
Guy must have a death wish :
Happy Belated Valentines everyone :-*February 18, 2016 at 3:40 pm #23328A woman was nagging her husband to cut the grass, to which the husband answered, “What do I look like to you? A landscaper?!”
Next time the sink was dripping, she asked him again, “Honey, can you fix the faucet?” The husband replied, “What do I look like to you? A Plumber?!”
Two days later, a light bulb went out and she begged him again, “Honey, can you change the light bulb?” His reply was, “What am I? An electrician?!”
A few days later, the husband comes home from work to find that the lawn is cut, the faucet is fixed, the light bulb is changed.
Very surprised, he says, “Honey, what happened here?”
The wife replies, “You know our new next door neighbor? He came over and fixed everything.”
The husband says, “Honey, how did you pay him?!”
“Oh, you know,” the wife says, “he told me that I could either bake him a cake or have sex with him.”
Somewhat relieved the husband asks, “Whew, so what kind of a cake did you bake for him?”
The wife replies, “Who do you think I am? Betty Crocker?!”
ROFL
to funny woody !
February 18, 2016 at 5:40 pm #23329Walmart Employee Caught Dicking Around At Work
February 18, 2016 at 6:12 pm #23330
February 18, 2016 at 10:22 pm #23331
Feeling lost!?
February 20, 2016 at 8:02 am #23332Meanwhile in maron's bra
[img]https://scontent-ams2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/12733418_892102824240992_7779285542180127124_n.jpg?oh=0df165cec0cfa3be9ccce70da6f111f0&oe=576B4E98[/img] -
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The forums › Quizz, Fav TV, Fav Music, Fav Films, Books… › Funny Finds