Gifts.

[Janine Dee]

Honestly I think one of the biggest contributors to the prostitution on AChat is the renewing A$. After a certain point you've bought all you intend to buy, and if you are monthly you will still be getting your deposits… with all that money just piling up I can see how hiring a hooker might seem better then just letting it sit and compound non-existent interest.

Or in this guy's case trying to buy friends/playmates.

[Anonymous]

Janine, according to him he has only been on about 3 weeks and said that most girls won't even consider a room with him if has not gifted in the past. It leaves a big question in my mind though…

I told him that I am not like most of the girls on here!

@ bobbler – am I telling the truth on this?  :

[Bear]

from my own experience, he may feel justified. I know I found it extremely difficult to even get a chat going at time when I started. So not unreasonable to assume that he has found it necessary, even to get noticed. He's looking for the quick and easy though….

Patience is not exercised often around here,…,the presumption is “let's do it ..now”,  which prevails over some degree of personal interaction other than sex.

Sometimes I just want to reach out, shake them by their virtual neck, and tell them to keep their pants on…

[Anonymous]

you know, i can see where he might feel he has to gift a girl to get her interest.  there are so many girls out there asking for gifts now it's kinda crazy.

@ cake: all i have to say to that is…mmmmmmm.  oh, and did you say something about knots? 

[Anonymous]

Bobbler, I so did! Very good at tying them and all different kinds too!  :-*

[Lover]

Hm, that really meakes me thoughtful. Guys think they must give a gift first to have fun. And doing this, they make the “real nice” girls angry…
If AChat would be my business, I would write a big note in the game:
“Guys you do not have to give gifts. Gifts are only needed, if you WANT to give it to your friends and lovers”
But I don't believe the A-Team will do this, as they earn money with gifts.

[Anonymous]

That's the rub, if I had known him as a friend/lover/spouse first, I would have been honored and truely grateful! But being it came from a stranger to me, it changes the whole context of the gift!

If guys could receive gifts, would they feel the same way? I don't know since I am not one. But how do you guys feel about it in that context? I am interest to see what your responses are.  :-*

[Lover]

Cakegirl, I undertsand your feelings. My post was not against you girls, I just wanted to give my thoughts. It's strange to me, that some members think they must give a gift, to be allowed to talk to other people here.

To answer your question, if I could receive gifts, it would be equal to your thoughts. I would not want gifts from unknown members, no matter if they are girls or boys. If my friends/lovers make me a gift, I could accept this. Though I would tell them before, I don't want it – to have nice talks or maybe more is more important for me. And tell me “old”, but I want to be the one making gifts. And yes, it also happened to me, sometimes a girl said “Please, don't do this.” Then of course I accepted this wish.

[Anonymous]

Lover, I was not saying you were against the girls, I know you are not! I was agreeing with your view and also very curious how guys would feel about this as well, just so would know!

Thank you for your response! Kisses! :-*

[Bear]

I re-read this thread and have no pity for this one,…he gifted and expected a room if I read this correct.

Sad that new members think this as mandatory to build a relationship.

@Lover in this case it was an expectation of sex…without any personal touch. cakegirl called him on it,…almost a wtf moment,…”you mean actually talk is required?”  …what a concept….

And cakegirl, I would be personally offended by a gift with the expectation to perform without some form of contact. I am easy,…,and under different circumstances took blinds often just to meet people, .. You are being way to tolerant,  and in,  that being rather kind hearted about the situation.

[Lover]

Bear, I don't talk about this single one. I mean it more in general. Are they not able to read? Don't they understand this game, because their English is too bad?? Are they feared to ask and to talk first? Do they really believe, they have to pay for the room? Or do they just think it's easier and faster doing this way?

[Janine Dee]

Well Lover, one of the most common truisms in dealing with people is to be yourself. It might not guarantee they'll like you, but it will certainly save time finding out if they won't. By the same token another truism is to treat online much like in person, because while there can often be certain rules of behavior you usually won't get yourself in trouble acting like you would on the street.

At best this guy was acting like he was trying to buy a girl a drink to get her attention. The problem is much like in real life he somehow figured buying her the drink obligated her to him.

At worst this guy was acting like he could just swipe his credit card and get some female attention.

And then we he didn't get the attention he wanted a refund?

Behavior like that in real life would get a guy slapped. This really isn't that different.

[Bear]

@Lover Misunderstood your intent as being general in nature. I think the last statement is the closest..just an easier presumption.

[Lover]

As I said, Im not talking about this guy. I just asked myself, how does it come to this thinking here in AChat.

You also know, many people have a big problem to act like they are. There are many reasons,but  not an AChat reason. Some dont have an healthy self-confidence, some want to please other ones, some want to protect themselves…

Yes, some also think they may behave like an asshole, cause nobody knows them in real. These one you can ignore or treat them like assholes too. I prefer the first solution (as long as possible), cause I dont waste my time and my thoughts with idiots and assholes. They are not worth it. I also can not be bothered to annoy me, my time and my life is much too precious.

[Lover]

@Bear: We published at the same time, so my post doesn't include your post.
I think we talk about

Or do they just think it's easier and faster doing this way?

Probably this is very close to the real reaon. But do they do this, as they are using this way in real life, too? Or because they “have learned” it here?

By the way, as you and I don't act this way, we don't have to spend our time with this discussion.

[Author]

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