The Achat Bar & Grill . ( AB&G )

[hukk]

My face is still plastered against the dirty bar table, my mouth drooling out saliva while I remain unconscious.

I begin to moan incoherent words concerning magic, my arms shuffling around the table, as if trying to grab something. I begin to have a vision. I see  a man. I see Neil Patrick Harris.

I slowly pick my head up, displaying a droopy, dazed expression.

“Neil Patrick Harris….is that you..?” I ask in a sloppy slur. “Yes my stupefied friend. It is the one and only. The legend in the flesh. Neil Patrick Harris, or as I am known in the streets, NPH.”  He says, taking a bow. He casually proceeds to pick from my jumbled, matted hair, a cigar that sticks out from the top.

He starts to search his pockets, then looks at me. “Hm..I can't seem to find a lighter..would you happen to have one?”

I shake my head “Um…”

NPH flashes a smile and holds up his hand. “No worries. Shazzam!” With a quick flick of his fingers, he ignites the cigarette.

My jaw drops, as I marvel at his wizardry. “Whooa, how did -”

“I suddenly create fire from my fingertips?” NPH asks, cutting me short. “Oh my drunk, simple minded friend, you forget that I studied the art of magic. Also you're currently passed out in a bar, and having a dream. Pretty much, you can make anything happen in this wild and crazy fantasy of yours.”

” You mean this isn't really happening..?” I ask, in a disappointing tone.

“You mean you're asking me if I, Emmy award winning actor, and magician extraordinaire is actually here with you, talking to you in a bar? C'mon man, the real NPH has better things to do, then to chat with some drunk slob. Besides take a look around you. Does any of this seem plausible?”

I begin to scan the bar. I see a huge Tango bottle singing about Achat land.

Next, I fix my gaze to a Pink Panther telling a horrible, horrible, Gorilla Joke.

“Now that you mention it…all this does seem a little odd….” I reply back. I look over to my side and see a passed out Panda. “Yea..a giant panda..I must be drunk.”

NPH puts out his cigar and shakes his head. “No, that's Pachacuti. He's real. Everything else though…” he points to his head with one finger and twirls it around, indicating I was crazy.

“What should I do..?” I ask, sheepishly. “You get up.” NPH, answers back.

“Get up?” I ask. “Get up.” he repeats once more. NPH suddenly stands over me and begins to scream into my ear. “Get up Hukk. GET UP HUKK. GET UP!”

I collapse off from my chair and land on the dusty, creaky wooden floor. “Foxy and Ol' Joe stand above me, their arms folded, shaking their heads.”

“Where…did NPH go..?” I ask, darting my eyes in every which way direction. “NP who..?” ask Ol' Joe. Halie helps me get to my feet, dusting my hair and clothing off. “You were screaming on about magic and Gorillas, that we decided to try and wake you up.” she explains. I feel a throbbing headache, as I stumble forward.

“Who won the fight?” I ask, in a raspy voice. “It was a close bout', but Stone came out on top!” Ol' Joe exclaims. With the help of Ol' Joe and Foxy, I make my way over to Stone, who is celebrating with Jay and all the rest. I give her my congratulations, before making my way to Brandy who seems a little downhearted from her defeat, but over all still joyful. I provide her a hug, and wish her better luck next time in her next bout against the current reigning bar wrestling champion 'Stone Cold.'

“I think I'll go home for a bit, to freshen' up.” I say. “Sure you can handle the drive..?” asks Ol' Joe, with a worried look.

“I've done this millions of times…I got dis'..” I reply back.

As I leave I see  maekimmi and snowbunny, seated by the bar counter, sipping their drinks. I tip my proverbial hat to them and give my hello's before exiting the bar. 

[Covems]

Seeing my chance, I make my way to the microphone… I tap it a coupld of times…  “Is this thing on?”

Why did the loose cowgirl get fired?
She couldn't keep her calves together.

****************

Why did cavemen drag women by the hair on their head?
If you drag them by their feet, they fill up with mud.

****************

A woman arrived at a party and while scanning the guests, spotted an attractive man standing alone.
She approached him, smiled and said, “Hello.  My name is Carmen.”
“That's a beautiful name, he replied.  “Is it a family name?”
“No,” she answered.  As a matter of fact, I gave it to myself.  It represents the things that I enjoy the most – cars and men.  Therefore, I chose 'Carmen'.”
“What's your name?” she queried.
He answered, “B.J. Titsengolf.”

Thank you… I'll be here all week.

[Brandybee]

I enter the AB&G having just arrived from my Cabin at Crystal Lake, and parked my car. There is a vague sound of a Raven cawing in the distance before the noise of the bar, drowns it away.
I hold the necklace sapphire around my neck, gently thumbing the tear drop shape and join JD and Old_Joe at the bar.

Tango was up on stage. The song was catchy.

“ All  bound for Achat land “ …  I began singing to Tangoracer’s song and dancing around JD who was vaguely amused by my swaying body and attempts to get him to swing his pants.

We all cheer as the song nears its end and shouting “More” “more” and “Encore” but Tango smiled, waved to us away and joined his beloved HB.

Lover and Roxxy smooch away as some tunes kick in from the Jukebox.

Peeka heads off to Tango’s Spa room and I notice HB watching her with Tango.

Hukk interrupts me on his way out and I throw him a bottle of water for his journey home. Its hot outside and he may suffer of dehydration with all the booze he’d been drinking.

Old_Joe kindly places a cup of tea in front of me in the bar and I smile at him gratefully.  I pick it up looking around, thinking that Easter will soon be here and we should perhaps have an Egg and Hat Fest.

Maekimmi  enters the bar and Old_Joe moves along the bar to serve her. “Welcome to The AB&G”  I greet her and see Bluedenim and Momma_Andrea pass us, walking towards the Pool Room and secret passage to the dungeon.

I stop Blu and whisper to her,  “JCM had an important call to leave suddenly. I think Sexilicious may need your help in the Guest Dungeon, when you get chance,”  She grins at me as I pass her the key.
“Sure,” she replies, “When I get chance” and looks longingly at Momma Andrea walking ahead.
That makes me chuckle and we high five each other before she scurries after her.

I turn to Maekimmi again as she asks questions about the Spa and Massage room.  I explain that Tango runs that and recommend his excellent massages.

Covems suddenly walks in and a big smile beams wide on my face. I watch him as  he heads to the stage and cracks a few jokes.
JD and I shake with laughter.  “God I missed him,”  I manage to speak between gasps of breath. JD nods in agreement.
When he finishes and replaces the mic I shout to him over the noise,

“Hey Cove,  I need to speak to you,”  I try to get his attention,  “There’s the little matter of the Bar Tab…” 

[tangoracer]

After Finishing my song I leave the stage and spend time with my sweet love HB and watch as Covems takes to the mic at tell his Bad Jokes again. But there so bad they still make the Bar laugh and clap I give HB a kiss and make my way back to the stage ant step up to the mic again.

“Ladies and Gentlemen my next song is one I have song before but i have brought it up to date I hope you all like the new version of”  I purse for a few seconds as everyone tuns to look round at me.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN I give you
THE BAR and GRILL NUMBER  FIVE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DKUJ4cB1ewg

One, two, three, four, five, everybody in the car so come on let's ride…
To the Achat Bar around the corner.
The boys say they want some gin and juice but I really don't wanna.
Beerbust like I had last week.
I must stay deep 'cause talk is cheap.
I like Azrielle, Brandy, Stone and ALita.
And as I continue, you know they're getting sweeter.
So what can I do? I really beg you my Lord.
To me flirting is just like a sport.
Anything fly, it's all good let me dump it.
Please set it in the trumpet.

A little bit of HGO in my life,
A little bit of Karen by my side.
A little bit of Blue’s what I need,
A little bit of Roxxy’s what I see.
A little bit of Stone in the sun,
A little bit of HB all night long.
A little bit of Brandy here I am,
A little bit of you makes me your man!
BAR & GRILL number five.

Jump up and down and move it all around.
Shake your head to the sound, put your hands on the ground.
Take one step left and one step right.
One to the front and one to the side.
Clap your hands once and clap your hands twice
And if it look like this then you're doing it right.

A little bit of HGO in my life,
A little bit of Karen by my side.
A little bit of Blue’s what I need,
A little bit of Roxxy's what I see.
A little bit of Stone in the sun,
A little bit of HB all night long.
A little bit of Brandy here I am,
A little bit of you makes me your man!

Trumpet, the trumpet.
BAR & GRILL number five, ha, ha, ha.

A little bit of HGO in my life,
A little bit of Karen by my side.
A little bit of Blue's what I need,
A little bit of Roxxy's what I see.
A little bit of Stone in the sun,
A little bit of HB all night long.
A little bit of Brandy here I am,
A little bit of you makes me your man!

I do all to fall in love with a girl like you.
Cause you can't run and you can't hide.
You and me gonna touch the sky.
BAR & GRILL number five

[hukk]

Having recovered back at my place from the reckless St. Patrick Day drink fest, I return back to the bar fresh and sober, ready to watch the NCAA(M) basketball Tournament between Kentucky Wildcats and Uconn Huskies. I take a seat and make my way over to the large wall mounted TV placed over toward the end of the bar counter to watch the game. I see Pachacuti already seated, watching what seems to be the Nature channel, featuring wild Panda's loafing around eating bamboo sticks. The volume is up loud, and all you can hear (besides Tango's swinging song about the lovely Achat ladies) is Morgan Freeman, narrating the scene.

“Panda's. Natures gentle fuzzy giants. For the next 3 hours..I, Morgan Freeman, will narrate Panda's eating bamboo leaves…while you, the viewer are slowly lulled to sleep by my slow, drawn out voice. This is 'March of the Panda's'.

I look over to Pachacuti who seems to be really drawn into the show. I motion over to Joe to come over. Joe arrives, and rests his hands on the bar counter. “Yea Hukk, what can I do ya' far?” he asks in a gruff tune.

“Um, is there another T.V around here?” I ask. Joe shakes his head and points back at the TV behind him.

“Nope, that's the only one.”

I look down at my phone, realizing the game has just started. “Well, is it possible to change it? The NCAA Championship is on.” 

“Gotta ask Pachacuti, Hukk. He's been clamoring to watch this show for weeks now. Good luck.” Joe replies back.

Rolling my eyes, I couldn't believe my rotten luck. Of all the days for this stupid nature marathon to show..I return my attention to the TV monitor to see the 'action' unfold.

“Here is 'Kaila' eating bamboo leaves. My, oh my, what a magnificent display of beauty and tranquility.”

I drag my hand across my face, unable to watch anymore of this. Suddenly, I noticie the remote control by Pacha's paw…slowly I sneak my hand towards it.

“Hey, Pacha buddy…good show. You know what would be better, though? Basketball!” I say, with a big smile.

Pachacuti seems to pay no mind….his focus completely given to Morgan Freeman's voice and panda's.

Finally, my hands rest on the remote and I begin to slide it over to me. Instantly Pachacuti turns his head toward me, and snarls loudly.

“ROOOAR, GROWL!”

I nearly fall off my stool, taken aback by Pacha's sudden show of aggression.

“ARRRRGH! Stooooooone!” I yell out.

Stone arrives, still gloating in her triumphant wrestling victory over Brandy, hours ago. “What's up?”

I point at the screen angrily “I want to watch the damn basketball game, but Pacha' is here watching this stupid animal documentary.”

“Sorry Hukk..but he had first dibs for the T.V. Besides, he's been aching to see this show for the longest.” Stone replies.

“Can't you just ask him to play outside or something?” I retort.

Stone sighs, placing her hands on her hips, staring back at me with admonishing eyes. “He's NOT some little puppy, Hukk. He's like everyone else. You gotta deal with it.”

“Of all the gin joints…” I say under my breath. I slump down, resting my head on both hands..in utter disbelief at my misfortune.

For a moment I look up, staring at the screen.”Oh! Looks like Kaila is about to get up! Wait..no. She was just trying to retrieve more bamboo leaves to eat. What a jolly, trickster she is!”

[freddie]

i enter the bar and go straight to Old Joe
“Hey Joe! I need something strong tonight,i think 2 jacks and a bulldog would be fine for now”
“Whats up Freddie?” He asks
“Same old story man…this heart of mine cant find peace lol…anyway..i know i've missed a grat cat fight”
“Yeah you did bud, it has been awesum”
“Fok…next time i wanna be here lol” we both laugh as he hands me my drinks
I gulp down the first jack and put the other into the beer
“I hope to see Lover tonite, i need to play something”
I turn myself to see who is in the bar
“And maybe some consolation”
I turn back to Old Joe and grin to him
He smiles to me ” never saw you so low Fred you better play something”
“Yeah man you re right”

[Lover]

“Hey man, where have you been?” I shout and slap freddie on his shoulder. He almost spits his drink…I laugh “Good to see you again! How are you?”

[freddie]

“hey Lover my friend ive seen better days lol, but you know…the best is yet to come”
I guide him to table screamin at Old Joe ” 4 beers pls , we have to talk “
“Tell me about you Lover and then we can play something”

[zoerink]

When my days are close to finish here on land of magic, i come as always to the achat bar. Is early in the morning, and i want to take some beers with people from forum village. Ists time to go, and will go for much longer time, cause the work is what have, the good weather is come in, and means i will be outside, nice and hard as time.

The best thing of work in a place without shopings, bars, restaurants is that you can save lot of money, so….

I PAY THE NEXT TO EVERYONE!!!

[img]http://alcademics.typepad.com/.a/6a00e553b3da2088340147e28edd25970b-pi[/img]

[Peeka]

After more then 45 minutes of pleasuring myself in the shower, I eventually turn it off and take my time to get dry.
A bit out of my mind, not realizing what I just did, but enjoying the feeling we have after good sex.

Then I dry my clothes under the electric hand dryers and put them on again.

They look awful and I feel so calm and relaxed, I decide it's time to head home again.

Coming back in the bar, the partying crowd looks to me like a bunch of crazy people and the noise overwhelms me. It is too much.
But I cross the crowd and walk to Brandy and Stone who are dancing.

Whispering in Brandy's ear: “thank you so much honey! You can't imagine how much I appreciated your fight. You lost it, but you won a fan.” And with a big smile I kiss her quickly on the cheek.

Then i go to Stone and whisper again: “Congratulations again! You both made me loose my mind somehow. Never saw such a sexy fight in my life. Thank you!” And I kiss her quickly too, gratefully.

But now i really have to go cool down a bit. I'll be back tomorrow.

I wave all the dancing friends good bye and on my way out, I firmly pinch hukk's butt and throw him a look meaning “See I got my clothes clean again, but you deserved this pinch” And walk away shaking my butt as sexy as I can in a proud and teasing manner.

[FoxyRoxxy]

Dancing to the music playing in the back and  so close to my Love  I can hear his heart beat  kissing his sweet lips .
How I enjoy every moment with you  baby you make me so  Happy  :-*  I see your friend freddie  came in  he looks
sad honey  would you like to go cheer him up  we walk over to  the Bar and  join freddie 

[zoerink]

Just come… to say everyone,

SEE YOU SOON!!!

Kisses and thanks to all.

Lets have a drink for me!!!

[Marilyn]

Cheers Zoerink 
Wishing you a good time and luck with your work projects!
Have fun and take care, Vecino. 

[freddie]

Lover and Roxxy smile at me while i tell them my heart troubles ” same old story my friend” he says…and we all start laughing.
it's very nice to see how Roxy looks Lover, im happy for them
” so Roxxy do you mind if i take your man with me on stage now?”
i see her eyes opening wide “no Freddie …of course not…what you have in mind?”
“you will see….and listen lol”
i grin to my friend, he knows what i have in mind
we go on stage and take 2 stools , take seat and adjust microphones
in my hands i have a nice martin acoustic guitar . we'r gonna make a great Slash's song in acoustic
i look at Lover and he nods to me , then i start talkin
” hello B&G
it's really nice to back on this stage
i wanna tell you something: i'm sure that all of you have been through good and bad times
ther is time when all seem to love you
and others when no one see you
times that you live so fast
and others that all you wanna do is sleep
times when an angel is by your side
and others when a devil hold you
this song is for that devil
enjoy it

Slash  “Not for Me ” Max Session
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uzfk6068ngw

i start playing my chords slowly , those sweet notes fill the silence and then Lover start singing

Dirty sunrise creeping in
Broken bottles
Guilt within
The room is black
The blinds are drawn

I don't remember anything
What I've done, where I've been
Another night has come and gone

This is not for me, no
This is not for me, no
This life is not for me, no
This is not for me, no
Anymore

the song here grows powerful and the voice of Lover becomes higher
the guys of the band join us with bass and drum

The Devil smiles and laughs at me
Says you'll be back, just wait and see
You know I've heard this all before

And I say
You can keep your high life in the hills
Your cocaine lies and whiskey thrills
I don't need you anymore

This is not for me, no
This is not for me, no
This life is not for me, no
This is not for me, no
Oh, oh

The only thing that makes me whole again
Is to stand right here before you with a song
Oh, oh
I'll keep running till the very end
For the life I've lived is not the life I want

Dirty sunrise creeping in
Broken bottles, guilt within
In a place I don't belong

This is not for me, no
This is not for me, no
This life is not for me, no
This life is not for me, no
Anymore
Yeah

You can keep your life
I don't want it anymore, yeah
I'm gonna leave it all behind, yeah
I'm gonna leave it all behind, yeah
I don't want no more, don't want no more
Yeah, yeah, yeah

cheers and claps as the song fades away
high five to Lover ” you been great friend…what a voice ! “
“thank you all guys”

[Lover]

Freddie and me high five and we nod to our guys.
“Ok friends, we have one more song and im sure none of you will keep sitting. Get up, move your tits and asses and lets rock this bar LIKE A HURRICANE!” The last words im more screaming. We dont wait for an answer, with my last word freddies guitar starts to scream and i throw my stool into the corner…

Scorpions – Rock You Like A Hurricane
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OI2COawqMJQ

It’s early morning
The sun comes out
Last night was shaking
And pretty loud
My cat is purring
And scratches my skin
So what is wrong
With another sin
The bitch is hungry
She needs to tell
So give her inches
And feed her well
More days to come
New places to go
I’ve got to leave
It’s time for a show

ALL TOGETHER NOW

Here I am, rocked you like a hurricane
Here I am, rocked you like a hurricane

My body is burning
It starts to shout
Desire is coming
It breaks out loud
Lust is in cages
Till storm breaks loose
Just have to make it
With someone I choose
The night is calling
I have to go
The wolf is hungry
He runs the show
He’s licking his lips
He’s ready to win
On the hunt tonight
For love at first sting

I run to the left and to the right like a devil, turning around with the micro in my hand

Here I am, rocked you like a hurricane
Here I am, rocked you like a hurricane
Here I am, rocked you like a hurricane
Here I am, rocked you like a hurricane
Rocked you like a hurricane

It’s early morning
The sun comes out
Last night was shaking
And really loud
My cat is purring
It scracthed my skin
So what is wrong
With another sin
The night is calling
I have to go
The wolf is hungry
He runs the show
He’s licking his lips
He’s ready to win
On the hunt tonight
For love at first sting

We got everybodys on his feet, I even see some people dancing on the tables,
waving their arms to the air… everybody is rocking and singing

C'Mon C'mon C'mon I wanna hear you

I hold the micro to the audience and shake my head to the rhythm  of the song
with one hand i tear my shirt off my body, go down to my knees and slip to the front of the stage
Freddie is giving everything,his guitar is rocking the bar… flashes are coming out, filling the bar with red lights

Here I am, rocked you like a hurricane
Here I am, rocked you like a hurricane
Here I am, rocked you like a hurricane
Here I am, rocked you like a hurricane
Here I am

Lights turn offand for a moment its quiet. I look to the guys, we all laugh and when my eyes meet freddie, i can see he is smiling too. We rocked the bar! I go to him, we high five again “Lets have a few beer, we deserve it!” He says. We go back to Halie, who is hugging and kissing me

[Author]

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