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The Game of Achat and People’s Feelings

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  • #6950
    Concerto
    Guest

    Well, I don't know what to call the post and I don't know where to post it but the sub-forum “Fantasies and Fetishes” seems an appropriate place.

    I can't put it where I would like to because a moderator has made a statement and closed that thread giving no one a chance to respond to the statement.

    Let's not lose sight of the fact that this is a fantasy, role playing game, just like any other. It is not a dating service.  In some respects, I wish it was, lol.

    We play to make the other person believe in us so that we can live out our sexual fantasies and, hopefully (well, critically for me), make them feel good too. Just as in Everquest, for example, where we have to assume that the person alongside us is a wizard and can help us resolve whatever situation we find ourselves in.

    We are not playing under real names, we are not bound to provide true city/country, for example, not any detail has to be true ( except perhaps over 18) and we can say what we like in our profiles.

    Many of us probably can't contort ourselves into the positions that we are able to play in the game.

    The vast majority of us are unlikely to cum once a day let alone every few seconds.

    The game is pure fantasy!!! As far as I am concerned, if anyone is at fault, it is those that cannot understand this.

    I am not condoning what the person did in this instance, I think it was ott although some might consider it was the ultimate in role play.

    And, I might add that, the last thing we want is tattle-tales, bullying and witch hunts. There have been enough people (if only one) that have been hurt by that and left the game because of it. A friend is currently being persecuted by some idiot male because she wouldn't room with him.

    I play by the rules of the game, I'm not hurting anyone. I'll tell you what I want to tell you (believe it or not, I don't care) and I'll answer as honestly as possible, albeit at the same time protecting my true identity (I don't want weirdos coming round at all hours of the day and night). You don't know who I am and, if you want to make love to me, I don't care who you are, so long as you treat me nicely :)

    #137367
    HisGirlOnly
    Participant

    I disagree.

    Everyone is aware when their achat lover is seeing their relationship as more than fantasy. At that point you make a decision either stop playing with that person or start being completely honest with them (if u are not already).

    There is no grey area, if you are talking of meeting this person in real life the fantasy needs to end.

    Yes this is a game, but behind every avatar is a real person, with real emotions, Don't play this game selfishly

    #137368
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Everyone is aware when their achat lover is seeing their relationship as more than fantasy.

    You know no more about the other person than they do of you. You don't know how they see it, you only know how you see it.

    There is no grey area, if you are talking of meeting this person in real life the fantasy needs to end.

    We're not talking about meeting in real life, we are talking about playing a game. A role playing game. Believe me, if the person is not who they say they are, the fantasy will end in real life and whether the relationship began with Achat or in some other fashion is beside the point.

    Yes this is a game, but behind every avatar is a real person, with real emotions, Don't play this game selfishly

    You really have to stop thinking of this as a dating service and understand that it is a role playing game.

    #137369
    HisGirlOnly
    Participant

    I was speaking in general before (and still hold my opinion) but

    In the situation you are referring  to…………..
    If you have taken your fantasy so far that you have to fake your own death to escape it, then you are a heartless moron.

    Karmic rules still apply, even in a role play game. People cared about him, people cared about her. They grieved for her, they pitied him, real tears were shed. You just can't play that way. It's not about this being a dating site or not. The avatars are controlled by people. They are not computers.

    Do as you will but harm ye none … treat others as you would have them treat u.

    #137366
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Well, you brought it up, lol, I only alluded to it in deference to the fact that the thread had been closed by a moderator and I have to assume for some good reason. I said it was ott and I was just as upset as anyone about it. The problem is that you may have now opened a whole can of worms because there are multiple facets to the story, perhaps you don't know the full story, and I don't want them to start appearing on my thread, make your own if you want to.

    Anyway, just for the record, “Do as you will but harm ye none … treat others as you would have them treat u.” could be my motto (although I might have written it better, lol) and if you read my post you'll see that I essentially say that. But, seeing that you used the word “harm”, I will say that it is a very subjective word and that, more often then not, we “harm” ourselves by accepting too much and not questioning enough. All of which is totally irrelevant because as I keep saying, this is a role playing game, so we can play the villain, the offended, the dumb, etc. without fear of breaking any “rules”.

    #137370
    Anonymous
    Guest

    as someone who has been accused of treating girls in this game like raids/quests… gotta say almost all of them hate that… achat=/=everquest

    #137372
    hukk
    Participant

    Taking a stab in the dark here and assuming everyone is discussing the recent deception of one WilliamWolf.

    I am not condoning what the person did in this instance, I think it was ott although some might consider it was the ultimate in role play.


    ^ The point that we all can agree on. Way over the top.

    You really have to stop thinking of this as a dating service and understand that it is a role playing game.

    I would agree with your point if this site advertised itself as just a fantasy role playing game; if it stipulated that role playing is the only element within the community and that one must accept a certain level of fabricated background when playing the game. But it doesn't. This is what Achat advertises:

    Online adult sex dating

    All we know, that Internet is a great place to get to know people, and even to find a real friend or girlfriend. There are lot of different possibilities to organize an adult dating. There are dating home pages, where we can fill in our personality page, and using this data we can find our possible partners. Then we can send message (e.g. E-mail), or if she/he is online, we can even talk to her/him using a chat program.

    All these possibilities are great, but can it be even more? Is it possible to have a real online dating using the computer? Can we meet our partner and is there any way to get to now her/him better? The answer is YES! A new development, the AChat program can do it in an exciting and funny way. Everything what online adult sex dating could mean will be provided by AChat.

    Let's take a look, how will be done a real sex dating with our computer!

    …………….The system is not only a dating service, it offers real online fun. You can get to know people using your real personality, or just play exciting online sex games with a nickname, without risk, without commitment. All that can be done while sitting at home or even in the office. Great online adult sex dating possibilities, great fun! Thank you, AChat!

    (click the below link if you wish to read more)

    Role play is allowed of course, but achat views itself as a credible means of acquiring a serious real life partner. People do come here in the hopes of starting something more. This may seem laughable to some, and maybe even foolish in trying to seek romance in a place that runs rampant with deception, but one must still -to the best of their abilities- respect those who wish to achieve this goal, no matter if your agenda is different from theirs.

    #137371
    Bear
    Participant

    I do not have much time to respond but the serious breach of ethics in this matter has created turmoil in the community and I feel obligated to at least respond to this thread.

    I resect your viewpoint Concerto that you see this as a game, but it is narrow perception which ignores potential psychological and sociological  aspects of sites like this if not handled honestly.

    Many perceive AChat as a social network site with sexual content. Hukk and HisGirlOnly hit on many points, but the crucial point is that many will equate sexual activity with emotional intimacy. The two worlds of fictional emotional attachment and genuine affinity will continually collide in an environment like this. However playing on emotional connections is a serious matter, and a game player MUST recognize the potential of psychological and emotional  damage they may inflict if they continue on a fabricated story line of emotional responses and the trust of honesty unless they provide full disclosure.

    I personally find such behavior which plays on the emotional level without a full disclosure that the scenario is fabricated to be  offensive, insensitive and cruel.

    The forum community felt a betrayal  in this matter. Genuine concern and grief were expressed in the matter. That the matter was a ruse damages the capacity of trust in the community as a whole.  Trust is a delicate matter. It relies on honesty.

    I understand your position Conecrto and I totally agree, to all be careful where you place your heart.  The first questions which any should be pushing on is a complete understanding on how their new partner perceives AChat. When those emotional tugs start on the heart. invest a little time in questions and discussions of Game versus social network. Are their motivations simply sexual? Where are their priorities?

    Gamers have a responsibility to be honest. IMO anything less then this in an environment of mixed cultures of the social/gamer environment is simply a bully mentality which tends to  permeate the internet It displays a predatory attitude,…immaturity,  ignorance, insensitivity and a long list of questionable moral attributes.

    Bottom line… have fun but not at the expense of others.

    #137373
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Well, I always respect anyone's position, especially when it is eloquently expressed.

    OK, Hukk, I apologise. I am someone who never reads the instructions until something fails to operate. So, when I said this was not a dating service, although I had in the back of my mind that somewhere there were comments that  perhaps implied that it was, I ignored that and, lol, I knew that someone would probably pull me up on it.

    However, I still don't understand why people consider this to be any different to any other game.

    I know it sounds crude to suggest that we are all here to win but in a sense (in many senses) it is true.

    We don't give ourselves away in poker, Monopoly, tennis, you name it.. and people are upset and cry when they lose and how do we, as the other player in the game, feel about that?

    I have lost far more in my life through Everquest than anyone can imagine but I recognize that, despite its addictive quality, it is not responsible and neither were those persons involved.

    As well, for example, if I feel hurt in some way in Achat, how do I know that I am feeling hurt for the right reason? It is a role playing game. Perhaps the offender was role playing. You have to assume they were as it is the nature of the game ( Lol, even the person who calls me a “bitch” may be a clergyman in real life and has never uttered the word in his life and just wanted to hear how it sounded). So then, if I role play that I am hurt, perhaps in order to gain sympathy or, alternatively, to chastise, and the original person takes offence at that, who is to blame? Them for their original comments or me? The answer is neither.

    It all comes back to my point which not only summarizes Achat but life itself.. “You know no more about the other person than they do of you. You don't know how they see it, you only know how you see it.”

    Oh and I'll reiterate my earlier comments…
    “the last thing we want is tattle-tales, bullying and witch hunts.”
    (although I guess you could role play those, lol) and
    “if you want to make love to me, I don't care who you are, so long as you treat me nicely :)

    #137365
    hukk
    Participant

    OK, Hukk, I apologize. I am someone who never reads the instructions until something fails to operate. So, when I said this was not a dating service, although I had in the back of my mind that somewhere there were comments that  perhaps implied that it was, I ignored that and, lol, I knew that someone would probably pull me up on it.


    *wags finger* Shame on you Su'.  ::)

    However, I still don't understand why people consider this to be any different to any other game.

    Again, just to piggy back on what Zoe and Bear said earlier the issue is how some people paint a very simplistic image of achat; it's either this or that. Case closed. You're trying to present achat as simply a game (something that has been disproved from the link I provided earlier; it can serve as a dating service), when in fact it is not. The games you mentioned in comparison to achat are a poor example because as Bear said, it lacks the key component of sexual interaction that creates emotional ties between the players.

    I don't know about you, but when I play a game like Call of Duty, I don't stop to have cyber with the person helping me in taking down a building full of terrorists. Each site or game -while having certain similarities- should be treated differently from one another, when trying to determine its structure. Achat is an odd hybrid of gaming and dating services that simply put, has no comparison because it is unique. Not recognizing the complexity achat displays, only serves to diminish that complexity and over simplifies the social structure of the site.

    All this essentially means a member must be forward when interacting with other players here, as the format of the site promotes both creative role-play and serious relationships. Like Bear said:

    ……The first questions which any should be pushing on is a complete understanding on how their new partner perceives AChat. When those emotional tugs start on the heart. invest a little time in questions and discussions of Game versus social network. Are their motivations simply sexual? Where are their priorities?

    Once that is clarified you are free to either continue your interaction with that player, or end the relationship (sexually perhaps but continue a social relationship).

    #137374
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Even if it's not eharmony plenty of people are looking for “relationships” here. The car accident was probably where willy crossed the line, whether it got posted in the forum or not… If you choose to rp in this way at the very least give the character a happy ending that doesn't tear your supposed friends apart.

    #137375
    FoxyRoxxy
    Participant

    I see  Achat as a game when I meet some one,  as time  go's  by and I  start talking to them and trusting them  and getting to know them
    that's when I see  how to  to  be with them, some go to personnel  some in to realty some  develop in to  deep feeling

    and some  don't  have feeling  the  fact is this is a  Game  and it tell  us to dream out our sexual fantasy's and you  can just about get any one
    here  real or not but one thing is you
    have to be careful not  to jump in to fast to a relationship before you know where its  heading to and how to deal with what kind of
    friendship relationship or  Fantasy  you are looking for

    It is sad that many  do get hurt online  many do want more then online  It is good to have a clear understanding  about your relationship
    before  giving your  heart out    and  if  it  dose  go to more you should always make sure you talk to them in  voice and other ways  that 
    is all up to each as  they wish we are all adults here

    Achat  is a  great  online  game that lets us  have our fantasy's  we  are the Adults  that have to make the choices  to make it as we wish real or not

    I have met so  many wonderful people and some bad ones to just be careful  we can only make the make the decisions for yourself not others.
    some are very bad .

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