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Ardeur

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Viewing 15 posts - 166 through 180 (of 196 total)
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  • in reply to: The Worst Pick Up lines EVER #19160
    Ardeur
    Participant

      If you catch a speeding bullet most of the times you just were in the way already, besides, you need a little time to aim or you might bump something crucial on a sudden obstacle.  :P

      *sees alstott speeding away and bouncing off an amsterdammertje with bulging eyes and a face that's turning whiter as time passes*

      (for those that aren't familiar with Amsterdan or the Netherlands in general: an amsterdammertje is a pole made out of stone, concrete or sometimes even cast iron that comes up to about 1 meter(~3 feet) and is generally used to mark off pedestrian areas or in very busy or less law abiding areas to keep cars off the sidewalks)

      in reply to: The Worst Pick Up lines EVER #19157
      Ardeur
      Participant

        If you want to try those lines “in the wild” you better be Superman or you might want to call an ambulance in advance… :D :P

        in reply to: The Worst Pick Up lines EVER #19150
        Ardeur
        Participant

          @alstott You might want to try those lines in a bikerbar… although, if they work, you'll probably be crawling out…  ;D

          in reply to: Room Ideas. #14291
          Ardeur
          Participant

            Hmm sounds interesting but don`t do painful things ,we are just horny boys ;D ;D

            I was talking about sweet agony, a case of blue balls with the knowledge of relief at the end when you get released. Imagine a crowd of luscious wet girls on their knees waiting for their turn to lick, nibble, suck until you're about to burst. When the time comes, they gather around hoping to catch a shot and swap it with the girl next to them while you collapse on the other side of the wall, utterly drained and orgasmic shivers still running through your body.

            *snaps out of fantasy*

            in reply to: Room Ideas. #14289
            Ardeur
            Participant

              Thew gym teacher came into the shower as one of the guys pushed his pecker through the hole. She got a hold of it and would have torn it off…

              I'd put a clamp or ring on it so he wouldn't be able to pull it out of the hole and give him a couple of hours of sweet agony on the edge…  ;D

              in reply to: More Sensual, Foreplay and Afterplay Poses. #48443
              Ardeur
              Participant

                @Adera the modern man might as well adapt to a whiff of feminism, why pretend to be a wallflower if you’re a man-eating plant… 😉

                in reply to: Bobbler. Messin’ around #42955
                Ardeur
                Participant

                  This was in AChat?

                  Anyway, it's a good thing being stupid isn't forbidden by law, it's a punishment by itself already…  ;D

                  in reply to: Pregnant customization #48314
                  Ardeur
                  Participant

                    [Randy Playah]: Hey, wanna fuck?
                    [Me]: No can do, I'm breastfeeding right now.
                    *Silence*

                    in reply to: More Sensual, Foreplay and Afterplay Poses. #48441
                    Ardeur
                    Participant

                      Welcome Cazzy,

                      hopefully one day the dev-team will hear our continues pleas for more sensual poses.. Thanks for your input!

                      Hopefully not only more sensual but more intimate as well. One of the most sensual poses I've seen happens to be the M/F-show what you feel-making out-action. The only pose where you're fully dressed (or as close as you get to) and it does almost as much for me as some of the hottest poses they thought up. They need to give the girl the option to initiate making out as well, though, that peck on the lips comes close to lame…

                      in reply to: FF Pose Review Request. 67. Rodeo Girls. #48267
                      Ardeur
                      Participant

                        From what the picture showed me, this seems more like something performers would do for the pleasure of an audience, not for pleasing each other. It might work if it was converted to a 3-way position, with someone at the back, but in it’s current state it doesn’t look like it’s worth buying…

                        🙁

                        Ardeur
                        Participant

                          Sneaking off with a friend to a quiet corner bringing along a book depicting ancient sex-positions and techniques. Biting down on a book you pulled at random from a shelf while your friend tries some of those techniques on you.

                          in reply to: Room Ideas. #14273
                          Ardeur
                          Participant

                            Little missy… *looks at Adera over her special teacher-fetish glasses*  Sunny here will not be available for shopping this afternoon. She has blackboards to clean and I think it's time for the hallways to be mopped as well. Her grades are suffering lately, so she will have to do her homework under supervision until she shows improvement in her tests.

                            *turns to Sunny* For starters we'll work on multiplication in the time we have while you're in detention as you seem to have problems in that area. And… ah, yes… you seem to lack grasping the material in physics too. The proper application of force on a body of mass… Girl, how hard can it be… I guess we will have to resolve that matter with a hands-on approach…

                            in reply to: Room Ideas. #14256
                            Ardeur
                            Participant

                              Teachers are still held accountable by the headmistress, right? In that case I apply for the position of math/science teacher.

                              Girlschool example:
                              You receive 5 boxes with 10 dildos in each box, you ordered those for 15 of your friends. If you make sure each girls have the same amount of dildos, how many will you have left to bribe the teacher to bring them into the classroom without getting them taken away?

                              in reply to: Condoms. Wearing a condom #47977
                              Ardeur
                              Participant

                                Well, they usually do last longer in a rubber, which usually to the advantage of the one on the receiving end… ;D

                                in reply to: FF Pose Review Request. 65. Masturbation – sitting. #9343
                                Ardeur
                                Participant

                                  Porn may be great as a source of inspiration when it comes to positions, but the should add something like “The positions shown in this movie are performed by trained and prepared professionals. Unless you or your partner have taken instruction from a trained professional, please don't try this at home!”

                                  I sometimes wonder how long it will take before you get lawsuits against porn studios for not having such a disclaimer and someone at home trying to copy something and tearing his/her partner a new one in their own stupidity… I mean, how long can it take? Some people are stupid enough to try and dry their pets in a microwave…

                                Viewing 15 posts - 166 through 180 (of 196 total)