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BrandyM

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  • in reply to: What is the Best Name for Shemales? #161380
    BrandyM
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    As a Transgender woman I can tell you it is a slur against those who are transgender and fighting for our identity. It makes many of us feel we are less than or makes us feel humiliated. It is often used this way towards us. It is difficult enough to find peace with a body that you are born into that does not fit how you feel and the struggles that go with that, without adding insult to injury by implying maleness or being male in any way is who we are by calling us a “Shemale”. It is no different than calling someone the N word or the F word if they are homosexual. It's derogatory.

    I came here to be able to be who I am without that awkward moment I and those like me have to experience in real life when we have to say “You need to know I am transgendered”. It is nice that people see the tag (s) and know that up front and there is less angst and awkwardness involved. It is refreshing. I simply wish that (s) be replaced with (t) or (tg) instead and not feel I am being objectified as some sort of “offbrand” male. I do not identify as male, whatsoever.

    Many transgender people regard the term shemale as offensive, arguing that it mocks or shows a lack of respect towards transgender individuals. I can tell you this is exactly how I feel as well. The term emphasizes the natal sex of a person and neglects their gender identity. Using the term shemale for a transsexual woman often implies that she is working in the sex trade. The phrase is commonly used in pornography. The word Shemale is degrading and has been borrowed from the porn industry.

    I was born male but am I not a female in heart?  I do not wish to express myself as male in any way. Transgendered woman or T Girl is more accurate and honest and far less offensive.

    What the term shemale says is your not really a woman. In fact not only are you not a woman but you are a sexual object. A play thing.

    It is both DE-humanising & denying a persons real identity.

    It's a derogatory term to denote a sexual plaything, a “unicorn” if you wish. It is most often used to denote the type of porn star who is male but has undergone surgery to appear female while retaining male genitalia. Transgendered women feel that they were born in the wrong physical body and would like to bring their mental image and their physical image into sync.

    If you've never heard it used in a way to indicate hostility, great. But some of us have and  I have. A lot. I don't like how it makes me feel. That said, she-male tends to have pornography connotations the way I've heard the word. I can't think of a single time I've heard that word used that it wasn't referring to something pornographic. To make the point, we don't call women “Shefemales” or men “Hemales” or female to male transgenders “Hefemales” The word is ludicrous and insults us because we identify as female, not male!

    This all being said, if you call me that word, i will simply request you not use that word, please. I do not like it and i will educate you so you don't do it again. If you insist on using it afterwards, then you are being mean and spiteful to those of us who don't like it.

    “Shemale” has some pretty obvious cisgendered connotations. Many in the transgender community feel it presents the implication that they're some kind of off-brand male. Porn is where you encounter the word, this should be your first clue that it is possibly offensive to those of us struggling with our bodies and gender identity.

    I'm not porn negative, but using words that have a primarily pornographic connotation to describe people outside of porn is not the way most people prefer to be addressed.I am human and I have feelings and i feel it is dehumanizing. If you think it is ok to call us “Shemales” I suggest you ask yourselves if you were a woman, would you wish to be called a “Cumslut” instead of a woman or a “Big Black Cock” if you're a male, because those words are pornographic words and i'm sure you wouldn't want to be be gender identified with them. I don't think you use these terms to describe these people much outside of a sexual context. I doubt you'd be super thrilled if people referred to your young daughter as a “lolita”.

    Sexualizing people's identities without their consent is at the very least rude. Using a highly sexualized term for a group with a history of being fetishized and marginalized can be seen as undermining efforts to be seen as more than someone's sexual fetish.

    With that said, I get why we need to be seperated from those playing women with a vagina and those of us who are becoming the women we identify as whom have a penis. Because of a need and the game mecnhanics required, we have tags like (w) and (s) so people don't get a shock when the clothes come off.I do not think it is too much to ask for that (s) to become a (t) or (tg) for those of us who do not want to be degraded with pornographic words. Even if it is a “sex game”. I think i have clearly explained why the word shouldn't be used and why it is hurtful. Thank you for reading and your time.

    in reply to: What is the Best Name for Shemales? #161370
    BrandyM
    Participant

    Trans Woman or T-Girl please. Shemale and Tranny are derogatory and offensive. I hate those words.

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