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[Janine Dee]

New, Honey, I NEVER doubted that, ever.

What we are running into here is that difference in styles. Before that post you quoted I had assumed that there had been discussion in advance, when it looked like there hadn't been I clicked into Dungeon Monitor mode. Which is basically that both of you are okay with it, so even if it's not MY way it's perfectly fine.

An example from a play party would be when I saw a Dom using a staple gun on his sub. *I* was wincing more then she was so I knew she was okay with what was happening. I personally would never do it, but it was not, and would never be, my place to judge.

Heck, I don't even like to break the skin. Between the infectious nature of blood as a substance, of open wounds, scaring, healing rates… I make sure I leave the skin intact, but again I'm not right, and those who do break the skin aren't wrong.

Still, love need not be gentle, and I never doubted the love between you two.

[Janine Dee]

I still remember when I first logged on here and was looking around a guy offered to show me the system and said he would invite me into a room. Now having only used traditional chat programs a “room” was just a private chat channel so I said sure. (You're right to laugh.)

I get in there and the image for bend over and fuck starts flashing and he tells me to click that… I got out of there at that point, I had homo clearly on my profile, and he clearly didn't' give a damn.

It was annoying then, it's hilarious now.

And I prefer my anime to be yuri… though if it want's to go pornographic I certainly don't mind… as long as it doesn't go futanari, or have any tentacles show up. (Sorry hentai  .)

[Janine Dee]

I dunno, I think that would distract from the AChat program. If they made rooms/channels IN the program, and maybe had a room/channel FOR the forum would be better in my opinion.

[Janine Dee]

Okay, I don't know how things are between you two, and since you seem happy together it's not my place to comment.

And as far as my style… I play with good girls. I want girls who want me, and who demonstrate as much. When you get into the whole “brat” thing I'm always left wondering “Is she just playing she doesn't like it or is she really not enjoying herself?” If anything the threads Sinnnn and I wove on here helped grow and develop my style. So you can see me subbing to her the way I'd want to be submit to.

But again, no right, no wrong. Just personal styles. It's as much a matter of if you would enjoy my style of Topping as if I'd enjoy your way of bottoming.

[Janine Dee]

Adrea dear, I actually re-read it just to get myself into the right mindset while I got myself caffeinated enough to reliably form multiple sentences. 

blue? The biggest trick to all of this is that there is no psychiatrist/psychologist who CAN define it all for you. From what you have said I would certainly say you have submissive tendencies, but much like my earliest Domme tendencies I still had to chose to act on them.

Obviously I did, and obviously you are, and you seem to be doing so safely, so you are doing very well.

The one area you seem unsure of is that it's going to be up to you to define what submission means to you.

You CAN grow into something, but you are never “expected” to. If you meet a Dominant who wants that you can agree to it FOR them, but the decision is yours. Like your clit bar with New. She may have put the idea out there, but she didn't restrain you and put it in over your protests, you did make the decision to do as she wanted you to.

Now by the same token you mention wanting to provoke me into taking my riding crop after you, but the way I've developed my style says I NEVER play angry. Even if I were to feel the need to punish you I would step away and bring myself back to a calm frame of mind before I'd do anything.

I'm not saying you are wrong, and I am not saying I am right. I am saying that we have different styles, and like I noted earlier in this thread people can be perfectly suited to their roles without being suitable for each other.

Like you've given wonderful examples of how you are defining submission for yourself I actually joined AChat to have a forum to explore submission away from the Domme role I (happily) wear, and while my Dominant side has certainly shown up here with certain girls  I also met Sinnnn, and I am DELIGHTED to submit to her. I trust her implicitly, and happy to give myself over to her completely.

But if you look at some of the threads she and I have here in Erotic Fantasies it's really very gentle in comparison to those things you enjoy.

Again however there is no right or wrong, but rather individual styles.

You and New both seem bi. So if she brought out a man to join the two of you that likely wouldn't be any sort of an issue. I however am gay, and if Sinnnn brought out a guy I would tense up, even knowing she knows that I could have a guy there, and even pleasuring her, but I wouldn't want him touching me. She however knows that and has never done that to me.

Yet again two Dom/sub couples having to radically different takes on essentially the same play event.

So beyond legal, mental and physical health concerns it's up to you to define your “right and wrong”.

[Janine Dee]

Definitely not saying “no”. I'm more saying that not respecting the nature of the sphincter muscle is like having sex without a condom. The damage that can result is different, but in both cases you are endangering yourself needlessly.

So I am simply advising to learn how to play safe before playing.

[Janine Dee]

Oh blue honey, none of us ever start out knowledgeable. I feel that I repay those who guided me early on by guiding others.

I will say more in the morning, but I just got home from work,  and am far too tired for deep Domme thoughts, but I wanted to let you know I saw your post and will be replying.

[Janine Dee]

Actually there is a radio show here in the states hosted by Doctor Drew (also the Doctor in Celebrity Rehab), and he had a prosthetic manufacturer that stated that one of their biggest sellers is prosthetic sphincters for those who learned their anal play from porno movies.

The heart of it though is that while you could argue the number of occurrences, what Bear said about the nature of the respective muscle groups can not be argued.

Play safe, play smart, respect the nature of the muscles you are using, or you will turn yourself into one of those cases, no matter how rare they are.

But really that goes for all of it. It's just the nature of damage unsafe play can cause.

[Janine Dee]

blue sweetie? I would recommend the thread of mine Bear mentioned. “Janine's Dungeon” in Erotic Fantasies. I try to have it delve into both the ideals and the realities of bdsm, and between myself and some wonderful contributors we've gotten some very good information assembled.

[Janine Dee]

Any and/or all of those please. 

The top four are all excellent variations on fingering with number 2 being essentially the one I typed all the actions out for.

[Janine Dee]

Happy New Year everyone.

[Janine Dee]

I'm more fond of Riding the Face, but this isn't terrible, though I don't really use the smothering actions.

[Janine Dee]

This one has a very special place in my heart as I championed this for about fifteen of those long eighteen months. So I am very fond of it.

[Janine Dee]

Double Doggy

Available in the shop for A$199. Please vote in the poll and share any thoughts you may have.

F1
Finger Asshole (Own)
Tongue Out
Rub Clit (Own)
Lie Down
Massage Breast (Own)
Dildo on Clit (You slide the dildo out so your end is sliding against your clit.)
Pleasure Face 1&2

F2
Tongue Out
Rub Clit (Own)
Massage Breast (Own)
Bend Forward
Dildo on Clit (You slide the dildo out so your end is sliding against your clit.)
Hip Twist (You press your asses in close and twist your hips.)
Pleasure Face 1&2

[Janine Dee]

I could take or leave “Enjoy!” but if they needed to pull something to make upgrades the “Pleasure Face(s)” seem a natural sacrifice. Especially since there are often a good 4 of them, and I know FF have them as well for removal/upgrade.

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