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[West69]

1. Probably it depends on the belief that a 3some with RB would be done much more often then with RG. RB is needed for MMF and if you can “use him” you dont need another man. But free man cannot be involved in 3some – they wanna make male members become premium.

2. We asked and ask frequently for this in several threads.

TY Lover. I very much appreciate you taking the time to respond.

1. I agree with you that a 3 som with RB may be done more often, but I don't agree that the dev team is appropriately interpreting the impact of this. The business goal should be to expand “premium” membership for ALL genders, not just narrowly for males. My belief is that opening up the 3 som opportunity with RB may encourage, not retard premium growth.
I have used the RG option to interest females who were shy about a 3 som, since this allows them to experiment with the concept and get comfortable. If this works with females, it should also work with males. More opportunities, more excitement, may bring more premium upgrades. Just my opinion.

2. I also agree with you on point two, but see no logical, technical, or financial reason this continues to be ignored. Unless someone gives me a specific rationale, I am left with the possibility that the restriction is based upon some gender prejudice or bias by management. :

Again, I appreciate the exchange of ideas. Hopefully management will also. We all share their goal of building a more successful game.

[West69]

……my feeling are so fragile…i can't, or i wan't maybe, trust peoples till the end……..
.i need time, a lot maybe, and maybe one day i can take the right decision.

While a rose can be appreciated from a distance, you must pick it and hold it close to revel in its' fragrance. Some never try for fear of pricking their fingers on it's thorns.
When your time is right, you will know it. Wear gloves my dear, but don't hesitate. Far better to cautiously brave the thorns than ignore the rose, letting it wither on the vine, never embracing it's sweet opportunity.

You are a gardener with courage. I hope Life rewards you with a bouquet.

[West69]

I had think about this all this weekend and at last, i decided to write this cause i need to have some opinion about something about my experience here….

As all you know, i'm a man but there are so many others things you don't know but maybe someone of you had notice…..well, first of this things is i don't have a so open personality in real. i mean, in my work i have so many contact whit different peoples and administration, so during this last 12 years things had move a little better, but when it comes about personal stuf and interaction whit girls, well, i'm a totally dumb ass and, please don't laugh cause for how i am it's totally embarassing, i have to admit i don't had have any type of relationship and you can easly imagine what it means: never had sexual experience before…..

And here comes the experience i have here and the only real one (even if it can be considered a full sex experience): from when i had started here at the end of august, i had meet so many nice peoples, girls and boys, and at last i had really enjoy both and some of them know about my true self, some peoples i really care or, anyway, peoples i find interessing.

Well, all begun 7 months ago….i had post before about i had met a man who, when he learnd i live in Italy, had say to me he would like to meet me cause he move to italy for work, sometimes. I explain to him all, about i'm a man too and i'm not into that type of stuff…..
Some time had passed from that and, before Christmas, he say it again and i answer him i don't had change my mind. After that, he disappear for long time from Achat, till he pop up again some week ago and we had met again, many times.

Till few days ago, when he said to me he hope someday he can do it in real……i talk whit him explaining  it again, about i don't want it or, to be more clear, i'm not sure if i want it. And last friday night, things get “worst” (it's not the right word….): talking whit him when we was in room, it cames out about my mail (in this moment, i don't remember how we end talikng of it) and he ask to me if i can give it to him. Ok, it wasn't a big deal, cause i had set one just for Achat (not my real name on it, of course!) so i had give it to him…..well, after few minutes, he had send me a pic of his huge cock……that had surprise me and confused me……i mean, wow, never expect it so much (but it jump in my mind he will probably do it)  but i feel my hearth bumping damn fast! we continue our meeting and it was so exciting….so much! and, before leaving, he had ask me if i will send him my pic…….oh my! anyway, i answer him i need time to think on it and i don't had make any promise.

But for this two last days, i can't stop thinking on it……on his pic……a part of me really want to do it, remembering my old experience (20 years ago!) cause at last, when i think on it, it was really exciting. it wasn't full sex, just jerking of in front of each other or stroking his cock sometimes (he had done the same to me) and it was only few times, but cant' get this tough out of my mind now….
Plus, well, i can't deny i had try something more by my self in the past years, even if it was just some isolate time……yes, i had try my fingers in my ass and some, well, sort of home made toys……i can't say i'd really love it, but even i can't say i don't had like it……

And now….something i had never expect before is happend….thanks to Achat, or maybe it's only the fault of Achat!? i don't know…..
Well, the point is this: i had start thinking how it will be touching his cock., playing whit it……i feel this desire growing little by little and pushing me to the desire of sending him a pic and maybe more…..till, maybe, meeting him…..and this is confusing me too much, never had think about this stuff before!

I had talk of this whit another friend here (he know i'm a guy too) and he suggest me to take my time: i know he is perfectly right and i agree whit him, but really….in this moment it's so hard to clarify my mind…..and this is why i'm writing it here, cause i really want to know your impression and, i'll hope!, maybe i can have some other good hint from you, my friend!

A really, really confused HB

As everyone has before me, I applaud you for your honesty of introspection. From your post you appear to have come to a point in your life where you are willing to ask yourself some very difficult questions. This shows a healthy perspective of personal growth that many people never get to. To reiterate a previous poster, only you can answer these deeply meaningful questions, and probably only you can phrase them to yourself so it doesn't produce negative feelings (hurt or embarassment). I respectfully suggest you make a list of questions for yourself and slowly and thoughtfully go through them.

I would never presume to pose YOUR questions for YOU. However, if I were in a similar situation, here are some thoughts I would share with myself:

  * How would I define for myself what you describe as being a “total dumbass” with girls?
    Am I nervous? Afraid of embarassing myself? Not confident with something about me,
    i.e. looks, education, enough money? On the positive, am I excited, both sexually and
    emotionally by women? If I do the analysis and I am truly attracted to women, then
    I may be able to remove my deficits, i.e. fear, lack of funds, etc. On the other hand
    if I am not drawn to women or attracted to them, then following society's rules may
    doom me to a life of dissatisfaction.

  * Hypothetically, let us say that I come to the epiphany that I am not attracted to women,
    but in fact, am attracted to men. First, I want some time to myself to come to grips with
    the admission that I am not going to be happy following what most of society defines as
    the norm. If I am ever going to have a rewarding relationship with any man, I must
    first accept that I am OK with it. Your post tells me that you are still in a state of shock
    because you repeat, “….but I am a Man…”. It is better to take some time to become
    comfortable with the fact that you might be attracted to a man. As your friend said,
    “take your time”. When you feel good about your decision, the chances of any
    relationship will improve. Your confidence and nonverbal behavior (smile & posture)
    will communicate you are ready.

  * Finally, and again this is just me talking to myself, I would ask if I want A relationship
    or this particular relationship. Just because I have discovered that I am attracted to men
    doesn't mean THIS particular man would be a good start. What does i mean that I have
    told this person several times, “No.”, but he keeps ignoring my wishes. I might be
    tempted to give him credit for perseverance, but since I am a skeptical person, I might
    wonder if he would accept my admonition of “No” when we are exploring a sexual act.
    If I am not ready, I want the power to decide, not be forced. Also, If I were pursuing a
    relationship, would the first picture I send a stranger be of my genitals. Does a person
    of this type want a “relationship” with me as a person, or quick sexual gratification.
    If I decide that sex is all I want, then OK, it is my decision. However, I won't delude
    myself into thinking that if I go to meet a guy who sent me a photo of his cock, that he
    is interested in my career, my family, my hopes, etc.

I offer the above only as examples of what goes through MY mind. Obviously, you need to select the questions that touch you best. I am only advocating the process of slow thoughtful self-introspection. With your post you have already demonstrated the courage to embark on this road. I believe most of your friends would encourage you to continue opening up this aspect of your life so you can better enjoy your sexuality. At the same time your posts project a sensitive and gentle nature. A little caution in this new area of Life may save you some of the pain that many of us have experienced, hence the cliche, “fools rush in where Angels fear to tread.”

Live fully, but take care my friend.

[West69]

One thing I do like though is people that are in achat for the fun not for the “oh I can get gifts” thing … its something i find just a little … fun killing asking for $A to play. Which is why I never do so.

…………. I'd rather be with Robot Girl if that's all they are gonna do..

Personally, I find Robot Girl skilled, but with a distinct aversion to monogomy ,i.e. she is a little “loose”. However, she did leave $20 on the dresser for me with a note saying, “Thank you for lubricating my circuits”. :

[West69]

Just curious, and doing several searches here couldn't find a topic nor even discussion about what people look for when choosing a partner on the game. What catches your eye when looking for a partner to interact with or just even chat with? 

Also would like to see what YOU use to attract other people when available to play. Would like to see all perspectives regardless of gender or sexual preference. Maybe this will be a fun thread to share ideas about it.

I personally like to use the city and country fields as well as the description area for lyrics from songs that express my mood for the day. With the exception of bare ass Friday's for cowboy boots day.    that is what I utilize those fields for,  and also choose clothes or a pose/animation that reflects that mood.

When looking for a partner I look at what the lady is wearing and her choices in body/facial features. I also look at heir pose and animations (body language says a lot)  along with what she shares in the description. I also look at their friends and lovers lists to see if they are interested in guys my age whether it be ladies much younger than me or ladies closer to my age.

Look forward to hearing other's preferences and ideas about this…

I look for some evidence of intelligence, sense of humor, and daring (depending upon my testosterone level that day).

I avoid like the plague, attitudes of arrogance (“I am the sexiest on here”), crudeness (taunting close-up pictures of genitals), and solicitation for money (“gift me and you can fuck me”).

[West69]

Geeez! are we gaonna have a cat fight between to school tough soon! 

How about a compromise to prevent fighting? ;)You can only wear them when you are on the trapeze, or so I can see them reflected in the mirror above the bed. 😮

[West69]

Hello dear peoples.

I may humbly see just two reasons for canceling a friendship myself.

First is to erase a mistake, I experiment “Cold”friendship, and … maybe because I act too quick or too stupid …
I may and accept instead of decline the “cold” request. So I may delete this … false … relation.

Second may be to flee a relation that became different than the relation that, at fist, initiate the friendship relation.
I guess … well … after warm, tender and interesting contacts some just transform into Predators with harsh … rude habbits.
This make me unconfortable not because of the rudes way, but because it is an … I don’t know the word, like “treason”, but less dramatical … Sorry.
of the link we hade made.

Anyway … “Friendship” relation type is not,for me, like true “friendship”. It is just a way to stay in touch easely with peoples whith whom I experiment a nice shared moment.So, maybe, later, may I delete relations with peoples I, didn’t met or exchange talkings with for long…
But I am not, actually old user enough to have “too many friends” to handle with …

Anyway, Is cancelling one, I may tell him or her, why did I.
Because it is also an another opportunity to re invent the friendship link, that may be harder this time…

This is only my point of view …

I Thank those who hade read me.
My best humbly Regards

With great respect I offer the word you may be looking for as “betrayal” as a substitute for “treason”. I would also offer you some encouragement and praise that your command of English is 100% better than my ability would be to speak in your language.

Thank you for sharing your opinions. They are valued. 🙂

[West69]

yes some aspects of real life are undesirble  in a “fantasy” game but not all 
i could go on about what ive seen done etc but a “fantasy” game is not the right place for it
if somebody asks about my past i do tell some . but the are things that ive lived through that i could never share wiith anybody
yes in real life there are many “johns” that have MURDERED there prostitute and they should face FULL justice ” they RARELY do “
i beleave that players af a “fantasy” should have the choice between gift or no gift
i may be wrong to think that allowing some parts of real life into a “fantasy” is wrong . but id like to think that senseable adults should have at least some freedom to choose

Just to clarify: I took no issue with your premise that everyone should be allowed to gift.
I also take no issue that adults have the right to make a decision to sell themselves, despite my personal opinion that it is degrading. My admonition was restricted to your logic, i.e.”it happens in real life, ergo it must happen on AChat.” This is fallacious and ill-considered. Although your points may  be valid, is does not follow that they would be  supported by an illogical argumentation of reasoning.

[West69]

gifting from any sex to any sex should no must be allowed . after all it hapens in real life so it should be reflected in Achat .I could see it cutting down on the numbers of female charactors almost demand Acoin before they will room with anybody . yes i know that people sell themselves in real life . allowing people to sell themselves here is therefore a must .

Following your premise to its' logical conclusion, in real life some “johns” MURDER their prostitute after they brutally use them. I submit that some aspects of real life are undesirable in a “fantasy” game.

[West69]

Thank you all so much for sharing your experiences and your reactions to them. All the points expressed make sense to me intellectually, although emotionally, I probably fall closer to Pafe’s sentiments.

Adera raised the interesting point about how each person defines “friend” differently. I won’t try to list all the attributes of what “friend” means to me. However, I do expect “friends” to be courteous, which includes giving me some advanced warning out of courtesy, before they kick me to the curb……even in a fantasy game.

;)……..but then again, perhaps that’s just me. : 🙂

[West69]

Cancellation etiquette?

Out of curiosity do any of you follow any self-imposed etiquette when you cancel a “friend”, or “lover”? I don’t mean the obvious, i.e when someone has done something rude or uncaring and they clearly have damaged the relationship. No, I mean out the blue with no warning.

For example, I occasionally get the message, “X partner has cancelled your friendship”. Usually it is from someone I haven’t heard from for a while, and I have no idea why they cancelled. The problem is that they have sent no message ahead of time so I don’t know if it’s something I said or did. My response is to always message back and say something like, “I am disappointed you cancelled our friendship. Was it something I said, or other circumstances”.

Most of the time the person is surprised that I even wrote back to ask. Here are the last two explanations:

1. “I was just going through and deleting a lot of people to clean up my list.”
2. “I have taken a new lover, and he demanded that I get rid of all my friends”.

On the first one i just shook my head in amusement. On the second I wrote back expressing hope that my former friend would not be hurt eventually by anyone so controlling.

I am sharing the above because I am interested if other people get “cancelled” without any preceding explanatory or courtesy message. In you do, how do you handle it, and am I stupid to even try to politely respond?

[West69]

…….. the closer a person is to the robot, the higher the chance this one is a free member.

Ahaaaaaa! I knew it. The Robot hasn't paid her dues has she?  😮 I just knew it! Once you get her on the bed, and look into her eyes, you just know you can't trust her. : She just kept yelling, “Fuck me…gift please. Fuck me…gift please”

[West69]

To all my friends and lovers,

                 Well it seems my bank has decided that both payment methods(ccbill eu) of this site are too risky to do buisness with. So until ccbill comes back I can't continue my sub.
                                                                  Ramrod29
                                   

After two hours arguing with my bank yesterday over a simple issue, you have my empathy.
Over the years, banks have FUCKED me more than anyone on AChat. 😮 Good luck. Hope to see you return.

[West69]

In reviewing this thread, I have encountered many interesting and potentially practical suggestions. If we sift through the emotion of some rather “spirited” disagreements, I believe we have furnished the dev team with many constructive suggestions.

However, in my opinion, it might be fruitful to turn from phrasing everything in the negative.
Unless I missed something, all the button choices so far have been in the negative, i.e. “Ignore……….” or block this or that. Flipping this approach to the affirmative is more welcoming, i.e. “I like to teach new users” or “I welcome free users to illustrate the advantages of a premium membership”.

The same concept applies to using a positive approach on what turns up on the other screen.
Several people have already given examples of being surprised when hitting “ignore” on their end appeared as “in room” on the other end. Maybe the next step is a list of messages the “receiver” will see vs just what the “sender” is initiating. Someone more diplomatic than I am can work on polite phrases that mitigate the disappointment of rejection.

[West69]

……… I feel that there should be a differentiation between free users, & those who were premiums at one time but have since not renewed. …….

My apology for abstracting your post because overall it was excellent. However, I wanted to highlight the one sentence above because it sparked a possible way to deal with the problem.
One potential solution would be to give “lapsed” premium members a different color star. For example, premium members with expired memberships could be designated with a red instead of a blue star. 

PS Anyone tempted to crucify me over my choice of color, please select any that you believe are constructive. I don't want to revisit Hester Prynne's “Scarlet Letter”. :-X I also knew that if I offered a suggestion for an “X” instead of a “star” that would get me pooped on. 😮 : I am simply looking for a compassionate way to solve the problem, without offending anyone. :-*

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